Child maintenance, do I pay it all?

[OopsieDaisies]

On the back of a thread I've just looked at, I've got to thinking.. if a RP receives maintenance via the CMS and a deduction is made for shared care (say, two nights a week for example) is the NRP supposed to pay for things on the days they have the child?

I've always been under the impression if they pay CMS they don't have to pay anything else. If the NRP gets a deduction based on overnights does it not stand to reason they are supposed to pay the expenses for that day themselves (breakfast club etc). Otherwise the NRP is getting a deduction based on how often they have the child but the RP is still having to pay the costs associated with those days? I'm not very articulate so I hope I'm coming across as making sense.

It is correct that the CMS say it covers all childcare. The only thing you can do is get the provider on board with amending your contract just for your days then tell him he will have to set up a contract for his if he still needs them.

Only you will know if this is likely to work or will result in DC being passed from pillar to post with no set routine childcare as he wings it and whether it's a fight worth having.

Thank you all. Some real food for thought.

@titchy

Am I actually allowed to tell him to pay whatever childcare he needs himself?

Of course you are! You're not responsible for the logistics of him getting to work on time!

Email - Hi Frank. Just to let you know I've booked the kids into breakfast club Wed to Fri - they'll be invoicing me half termlu. They have spaces for them Mon and Tues if you need to use it - they're happy to invoice you separately. This is the number if you want to book.

This is brilliant, OP. I have an ex like yours, and I too was nervous about this (I paid for it all initially). I spoke to the club first, it took some organising as they had no experience of sending two invoices to cover one child, but I insisted, and said that I wouldn't pay for his sessions. The message above is short, to the point and sounds like you've already sorted it out. Definitely send it. Be brave.

Thank you. I agree, a very well phrased message.
You're right, I need to brave!

Yes of course, that’s why the deduction us made as they pay when they have the children.

Which ever parent has child that night pays for clubs, child care. A caring parent will want to help buy their children's clothes too.

I agree that's logical but I can't find anything online that explicitly says it. All I see is all childcare is my responsibility if I receive CM

They should but dont always do that as I have found out

Whilst I agree about the clothes to some degree, like in the OP’s situation she barely receives enough to cover the childcare let alone clothe the child with any CMS left over, so clothes and shoes really ought to be more of a shared expense too. Otherwise RP is basically magicking things out of thin air. My CMS paid for school dinners and not much else

I can't be bothered with an argument with him for the sake of clothes and shoes. What annoys me is the CM he pays only just covers the childcare in place on his days as he needs it because of his working hours. I fully expect to have to pay for the childcare I need because of my working pattern but if he gets a deduction based on overnights I begrudge paying for the entirety of his childcare needs as well.

I understand. I think this is why mine only did weekends to be honest. Which I had to wash and pack all the clothes then unpack and wash them again. I drew the line at funding their new wardrobes for a 2 week holiday to Greece though (without me), so he just didn’t pay anything those 2 weeks!

Its all a bit of a nightmare eh!