I'm a LP with 100% care of my DD, 7. I've stuck around where I can for 7 years attempting to maintain a father-daughter relationship for the sake of my daughter.
Ex-P has long term MH and physical health issues. It doesn't help that he is also reluctant to do anything to sort himself out and completely unreliable (late to the tune of 1-2 hours each time we meet, sleeps in all day, doesn't work, refuses to access services / support that might help make his life better, sometimes EA with me and Jekyll and Hyde personality).
For the most part we get on ok but I cannot rely on him for consistent suitable childcare of any sort. He comes over, stays and "helps" out. He has a good relationship with DD but sometimes is volatile and I cannot really allow much unsupervised contact because of all his issues (he will not always meet DDs needs because of his own issues).
I have played the breadwinner, the carer and the organiser of everything for 7 years. I am now in the position to buy a property and cannot afford to live in my area (south East) so am thinking of moving somewhere in the midlands where I can afford a property.
I would facilitate ongoing contact as much as I can (pay for train tickets to visit, allow frequent holidays to stay with us, visit him sometimes) but ex-P is getting emotional and difficult about us leaving. I am also worried it may push him further down the spiral for us to leave but equally don't want to be emotionally blackmailed into staying. He flat out refuses to leave the area.
In all honesty I think a bit of a break for us might help me, separating out from all his drama has been difficult whilst living here and given me little in the way of practical support.
I am however mindful that it will affect DD and ex-P. But I don't wnat to miss out on my chance for property ownership just to stay renting a poor quality in my expensive city to facilitate a half baked supervised contact father relationship with my ex who cannot and will not get his act together, even when he is well enough to do so.
Unfortunately my area is too expensive to buy in and for what I want (a small house and garden) within my budget is just not possible.
Has anyone done similar? Got any advice or tips etc for dealing with ex? What should I do?