Stories of ex's regretting breaking up with you.

Twopaperaeroplanes · 2020-08-16T20:02:54+00:00

Hi, I wanted to know if anyone had any stories of their partner/ex breaking up with them and then later down the line (however long that may have been) coming back to speak to you cause they realised that wasn't what they really wanted? Please could people share their stories whether they're positive or negative?

Glitteris · 16/08/2020 23:49

Every single ex has tried to come back even when I broke up with them.

But very very very rarely does it work. Because the issues are still there and the older you get the more you change so you just have to let it be.

amusedtodeath1 · 17/08/2020 02:20

My Ex, he decided he was in love with a woman he worked with. Broke up our marriage of 13 years (together 20) and refused to move out (I had DD 6yo at the time).

A year later she left him for his best mate they'd been seeing each other for months before that. (Just like he did to me).

He wanted it all back, he was sorry, wrong, realised what he'd thrown away, etc.

It was a big no from me, of course, I'd already moved on. He got very depressed and angry/bitter. To this day (10+ years later), I'm still the worst in every way.

roxfox · 17/08/2020 02:43

@amusedtodeath1

My Ex, he decided he was in love with a woman he worked with. Broke up our marriage of 13 years (together 20) and refused to move out (I had DD 6yo at the time).

A year later she left him for his best mate they'd been seeing each other for months before that. (Just like he did to me).

He wanted it all back, he was sorry, wrong, realised what he'd thrown away, etc.

It was a big no from me, of course, I'd already moved on. He got very depressed and angry/bitter. To this day (10+ years later), I'm still the worst in every way.

Gosh. What a tosser!!

Good on you for not taking him back.

TheFormerPorpentinaScamander · 17/08/2020 02:50

Father of my dc came back 18 months after he left me for another woman. I agreed to try again for the DC. But we'd grown so far apart that it didn't work. I'd learnt to live without him and he didn't like that!

More recently my DP ended things because he had come to realise he didn't want a family and as I already had DC it wouldn't work. 6 weeks later he was back declaring his undying love for me. He said he wanted to be with me enough that he accepted the children were part of that. 6 months later I was left broken hearted again when he decided he hated my kids :(

So ime it never works. Having said that my mums friend had a relationship years ago. He left because he wasn't ready to be step-father to her teens. He was only early 20s himself. A few years later, after some growing up, he came back. They have been married for 15ish years now and have an 18 year old DD of their own

vegansprinkle · 17/08/2020 03:35

My Xp used to do this. I later figured out that his hanging around outside my work or love
Bombing me was always around the time that the novelty of his latest (mostly barmaid) had worn off.

Never ever again.

Are you ok OP? are you waiting for someone to return?

RantyAnty · 17/08/2020 04:17

Probably.
Some sex is better than no sex to a lot of men.

Flowers009 · 17/08/2020 04:34

I usually do the breaking because the guy fucked around but 9/10 they always come back

Flowers009 · 17/08/2020 04:35

@amusedtodeath1

My Ex, he decided he was in love with a woman he worked with. Broke up our marriage of 13 years (together 20) and refused to move out (I had DD 6yo at the time).

A year later she left him for his best mate they'd been seeing each other for months before that. (Just like he did to me).

He wanted it all back, he was sorry, wrong, realised what he'd thrown away, etc.

It was a big no from me, of course, I'd already moved on. He got very depressed and angry/bitter. To this day (10+ years later), I'm still the worst in every way.

Lol this story is just great... Karma

alittlebitofsunshine · 17/08/2020 16:53

I have had this today from an ex of over 30 years ago! He said that he can't stop thinking about me and he loves me. I pointed out that when we were together he was not very nice to me and that I would never forget that and that he doesn't even know me now. Prick

unicornsarereal72 · 17/08/2020 17:02

Yep kids dad came back earlier this year after 2 years of being with ow. Who apparently is selfish and immature and he wished he never left. There was a very brief reconciliation. In reflection I think they had a falling out and he had no where else to go. As he very quickly reverted back to his old ways. He is back with her now and I wish them the best of luck.

AryaStarkWolf · 17/08/2020 17:05

@amusedtodeath1

My Ex, he decided he was in love with a woman he worked with. Broke up our marriage of 13 years (together 20) and refused to move out (I had DD 6yo at the time).

A year later she left him for his best mate they'd been seeing each other for months before that. (Just like he did to me).

He wanted it all back, he was sorry, wrong, realised what he'd thrown away, etc.

It was a big no from me, of course, I'd already moved on. He got very depressed and angry/bitter. To this day (10+ years later), I'm still the worst in every way.

That's some delicious Karama right there

I bet the arsehole blames you for the marriage break up too because you said no to having him back

popsydoodle4444 · 17/08/2020 18:14

Not me but my husbands friend (ex work Colleague of his) Let's call him Bob who had a lovely girlfriend broke off their engagement.She (the ex girlfriend) let's call her Jane suspected it was something to do with a 21 year woman lets call her Meg who was 15 years younger than Bob and use to work at the same place Bob worked at.

Jane put on Facebook that she went home sick from work and caught Bob and Meg together in Bob and Janes flat as Bob hadn't moved out yet.

Bob told everyone that Jane was a liar and that Meg was just a friend who was supporting him through their break up and Jane was an unreasonable psycho who was making Bobs life difficult now they had broken up.

A few months after Bob and Jane broke up Bob announced he and Meg were in a relationship (no surprise there) and they had been friends who just "fell in love".

Meg turned out to be a huge annoying twat and Bobs friends began to drift away as the they didn't like Meg.Bob started spending time with Meg's friends and it was embarrassing watching on social media as Bob who was heading towards his late thirties was attempting to behave like someone in their early twenties.

Meg then wished Bob a happy first year anniversary together on Facebook.Unfortunately for Bob people can do basis math and figured out Bob had been shagging Meg for 2 months prior to ending things with Jane.

Roll forward 2 years and Bob is 10 days away from marrying Meg when Meg reveals she's been sleeping with the best man.Bob got jilted and a load of debt from non refundable wedding things.

Meg is still with the best man,ironically they've moved into the same block of flats as where Jane's best friend lives.

Jane is with a lovely bloke,they brought a house together last year which is something that wouldn't have happened with Bob as Jane was having to financially prop him up.

Single Bob started loitering around Jane's place of work whilst on his work rounds annoying Jane and dropping hints about getting back together.Jane's boss sorted this by reporting Bob to his employer.

Last thing I heard about Bob is that he got hit by someone on a push bike whilst crossing the road 😂

Jane is happy and expecting twins with her partner.

dillydallydollydaydream7 · 17/08/2020 18:31

Was with a bloke for 9 months-ish, he was very self cantered, didn't work, no work ethic, but thought he was the best thing since sliced bread, massive petrol head too. Off and on, found out his ex had got drunk and he met up with her and she ended up staying over (found this out from checking his phone - I never usually do this but had a massive gut feeling) confronted him about it, he pinned me against the wall by my throat and I walked out. To this day he still denies it, used to send me random messages about missing me and still sends me follow requests on Instagram. No thanks I'm happily married now

FWB for around 5 years, I really fell for him, friends for 12 years. Off and on for ages, he always said jump and I asked how high. We both know each other's position with regards to personal lives but a few weeks ago he messaged asking me if we would ever have a chance together... he waited 12 years to ask me this. I explained how happy I am in my marriage etc and he said he understood. That conversation hurt

TheKarenWhoKnocks · 17/08/2020 18:40

Quite a few do, most of them will at least give it a feeble attempt; it never works.

Are you ok op? It's always hard breaking up with someone but usually the reasons why it happens are reasons to stick with it. Unless it's civil war or something. If it's just two people not getting along, likely they won't in future either and it's best left. It is difficult though.

PerceptionIsReality · 17/08/2020 18:49

Mumsnet sometimes seems to be filled with stories of men cheating but later realising that the grass is not greener and coming back expressing regret.

My ex never did. Never looked back. Seems happy with OW.

I’m remarried now to a man I would trust with my life and heart and have a great life with three kids together. But for a long time all the stories on MN and the karma that the cheater gets - but mine didn’t - made me feel like shit.

I hope you’re ok and not counting on this to rebuild your life and self-esteem.

Lacey2019 · 17/08/2020 18:51

My ex did once. Swore he’d never come back and 6 months later, there he was. My most recent ex though who id to, won’t. Engaged, owned a home and he met someone else 4 weeks after we split, which was a bitter one to swallow

Original poster

Twopaperaeroplanes · 17/08/2020 19:44

Thank you everyone so far for all your stories. It's nice to see that you have all stood your ground when you've been done wrongly and mistreated.

My situation is more lockdown hit him hard he had a breakdown within himself wasn't happy with his own doings and choices in his life and because he didn't want to accept that blamed it on me even though I've done everything to help him. Throughout the break up saying how much he didn't want to end it how much he didn't want to lose me how much he loves me and cares about me etc. So I'm just unsure.

OP posts:

disconnecteddrifter · 17/08/2020 20:26

I had two guys treat me badly. First boyfriend from 16 -18 left me for two of my best friends, broke my heart and effected all my romantic relationships herein. He came back 15 years later, was possessive obsessive and I ended up getting an injunction on him. 2and boyfriend from q8 -21 was a bouncer always snagged around, no commitment. Still asking me out now 20 plus years later. Ex husband totally decent guy I broke up with him. He would have got back with me but never asked me. In my experience guys with no self respect will mess you around like that

BurtsBeesKnees · 17/08/2020 20:58

Without trying to sound big headed, but all of my serious BF's, plus 2 exh have tried to come back at some point. I'm one of those people who has to be 100% sure I'm done with a relationship before calling it a day. I have to have tried everything. So when I do walk away, that's it for me, no looking back and I'm sure I'm doing the right thing. Some came back after a few weeks, others have reappeared after a few months, some I've remained friends with and will let me know they are up for it if I was.

Lacey2019 · 17/08/2020 20:59

@BurtsBeesKnees

Without trying to sound big headed, but all of my serious BF's, plus 2 exh have tried to come back at some point. I'm one of those people who has to be 100% sure I'm done with a relationship before calling it a day. I have to have tried everything. So when I do walk away, that's it for me, no looking back and I'm sure I'm doing the right thing. Some came back after a few weeks, others have reappeared after a few months, some I've remained friends with and will let me know they are up for it if I was.

What is the longest time it took?. I think men are rather territorial!

feelingsomewhatlost · 17/08/2020 21:54

My most recent boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me multiple times at the start of lockdown (while we were living together), but he always changed his mind minutes later/I talked him out of it. I’m one of those people who stays until I’m 100% sure the relationship is done for fear of regretting leaving, but after the 5th time I just let him go. He moved out immediately and came round a week later to pick up his stuff. I made sure I wasn’t in but left a letter wishing him the best. Two weeks later he sent me a letter saying he didn’t realise what he had until it was gone blah blah blah. I didn’t respond and he hasn’t been in touch since. Why would I carry on going back to someone who wasn’t even sure they wanted to be with me!? Never again.

iwantmyownicecreamvan · 17/08/2020 21:56

Not in the true sense but I believed him at the time.

Married 15 years or so but together for over 20, two children 10 and 8, he meets someone ten years younger and has a 3-month affair. He plans to leave and live with her abroad (where she comes from). He is all ready to to this, but then she changes her mind and goes back to her original boyfriend.

He is inconsolable - confesses all. We have an uncomfortable few weeks. I ask him to leave for a while to give me some space - he manages one day! He asks what I want, I say I want a trial separation. He then begs for another chance, says he is sorry, it was all a mid-life crisis, think of the kids (pity he didn't do that eh). So I agree. Wish I hadn't.

We carry on for a further 8 years with him treating me with more and more contempt and ill temper. Eventually (by this time kids are 18 and 16 of course) he decides he will leave anyway, gives me notice and finds himself someone on line, leaves, emigrates and remarries within 6 weeks of our divorce.

I should have insisted he leave. In the end he left at a time to suit him and completely on his own terms and buggered up my life even more.

Never again!

LirBan · 17/08/2020 21:56

I don't have any, but none of them were decent men. I had a very low bar. Bad taste in men. So they didn't value what is valuable about me iyswim. Or they brought out the worst in me.

There is not one single person i've broken it off with that I regret that. It didn't feel right so I ended it. Never ended up regretting anything.

justinelequeen · 17/08/2020 22:11

every single time :'D

terriblyangryattimes · 17/08/2020 22:28

My first true love realised he had made mistake in splitting up with me for another person and a few months later wanted to get back together. However
he wouldn't break up with the other girl until I had said yes. So obviously I told him to eff off. We actually stayed pretty good friends once we both got over it and ended up sharing a flat together before we both married (other people!)