I will try to break this down so it's easy to read.
Divorced from ExH 8 years ago
He met new DP not long after and they have 2DC together.
I have zero feelings for him. I left him.
He normally has our 2DC EOW.
Lately things have been fraught.
They had a big argument in front of DD and so for the last 6 visits she has not been. She has been in tears even though I have tried to push her to go.
This weekend was his time. But then my DS told me that he can't go because his dad has gone abroad.
I was like ????
Turns out he and new family have gone away for two weeks.
Big fancy complex and on top of that his DP is having cosmetic surgery while she is there.
Now I'm not interested in what they are doing but I am really pissed off that he didn't tell me.
It was HIS responsibility to let me know he wouldn't be having them (well just DS as DD been staying home like I said)
But he left it to my DS to tell me last minute.
It's also quite cruel because they feel rejected.
When they are at his they don't so much as go to the park. They stay at his and DS goes on Xbox.
DD is usually bored stiff.
I've been asking for months and months for him to please do something with them.
I am single and I don't drive so the kids haven't been far this summer.
Usually I would get the train to the seaside but services have been reduced and there's the whole issue of mask wearing which is a bit much for 2/3 hours.
Anyway, my DC are upset.
I'm angry but doing my best to reassure them that he loves them.
It's so hard!!
I feel so sad for them.
He hasn't offered an alternative to them and literally does not seem to care.
Out of sight out of mind.
He will happily go the full 2 weeks between visits with no contact. No texts or phone calls.
Then when he sees them doesn't interact, just gets on with housework etc.
Last few years he hasn't seen them on Christmas Day either. All because he prefers to drink all day and not have to drive.
I've even suggested he come for a half hour in the morning just to see them with their gifts etc. And then go on his way. But he refuses.
I feel like I've spent so long trying to get him to see that the DC still love him and still need him but he just blames me for everything.
He will always say that I chose this life for them. I chose to be a single mum.
I chose for them not to have him around.
I'm just so angry and upset.
I'm not sure what I can do other than just let it go.
If I stop contact or anything it will be my fault won't it.
I just don't get why he can't see what he's doing the DC 