Hearts sunk

[Lacey2019]

Hello everyone,
I feel so lame writing this, but has anyone seen a picture of their ex and their new partner and your heart just sunk?
I feel so low right now

Just be strong, if he’s this much trouble now, imagine what he could hsve been like

@ChickensMightFly thank you. I totally agree. He’s so concerned with his image. He went to Egypt 8 months ago with this girl and there was nothing, probably because he knew people’s perception after a 5 year relationship. I feel so stupid saying that I feel upset about it, but it’s how he’s removed all pictures too on his insta that same day. Facebook everything still there I believe and still single as the girl isn’t on there. He’s so clever in what he does

@Nsky thank you x

@takenbywine I am sure he felt the same way seeing what a wonderful mother you are.

It will pass, I know it will, but it hurts. I think seeing her in my old home hurt, knowing she’d met his family etc. It’s feeling I’m never good enough or wasn’t and she is seeing how happy they are and him kissing her. He told me to prepare myself to see it in March, so He’s been nice giving me 5 months haha

My exH got himself a new GF who looked like me! They went on holiday together to a lovely tropical destination, and he posted loads of photos on his social media... it took me ages to twig that he was trying to make me jealous (i am a bit thick, tbh). It hurt a bit because in 20+ years of being together, he'd never taken me on a lovely tropical holiday... but it just made me feel a bit sorry for both of them.

They are still together, AFAIK, but he doesnt post lovey-dovey pictures on his social media any more, and the tropical holidays together seem to have stopped. Who'da thunk it?

It's nothing to do with being good enough or not.

You may feel hurt, but his new girlfriend is putting her faith in someone who is keeping his ex on the back burner. You should feel free and pity her.

A photo is just a photo! They're generally staged. You can't tell how happy they are or even how goodlooking somebody is. I am stunning in some pics and very normal in real life I can tell you. I'm just generally photogenic.

Anyway it might be the wake-up call you needed. Some people I think need to breakup in stages because it's just too overwhelming otherwise. So they try living apart but together, taking a break, being friends, always being there for each other then finally putting each other in the past. It's the way it should be I'm afraid. You're not his priority anymore and that is going to hurt. But this is the very last part of the breakup. When the pain of this passes you are done! And who knows what your future holds...

Thank you @Isthisnothing x

It's very hard but you're making up the story that lie behind the picture. A picture is a tiny piece of a second and their life together. How to do know they are as happy as you think they are? It's your mind telling you that, not fact.
Every relationship is different and for years I struggled with how can my ex not be violent towards to his new wife after I had 6 years of it out of a 7 year relationship. Fact is I don't know now the truth. Leopards don't change their spots remember!
I spilt from my ex 8 years ago and was livid last week to see him and his wife of 3 years have allllllllllllll our furniture still (they are pretty well off as can more than afford new stuff) ! Yes I walked away but to see my sofas, my tv cabinet, our bleeding BED and many other things in their house brought so much back to me (it was in a sales listing for their house his brother shared, I wasn't snooping through windows lol).
You simply just don't know what goes on. Concentrate on you. Don't waste any energy on yesteryears!

[quote Lacey2019]@ChickensMightFly thank you. I totally agree. He’s so concerned with his image. He went to Egypt 8 months ago with this girl and there was nothing, probably because he knew people’s perception after a 5 year relationship. I feel so stupid saying that I feel upset about it, but it’s how he’s removed all pictures too on his insta that same day. Facebook everything still there I believe and still single as the girl isn’t on there. He’s so clever in what he does[/quote]
Wow! He sounds so manipulative... You've had a lucky escape. Give yourself lots of patience and as many nice things to cheer you up as you can. Climb a hill and admire the view from the top, invite your best friend round for a film in your pyjamas, but a nice new necklace... Whatever it takes. It's ok to mourn and grieve what you thought you had and the future you thought you were heading towards... When the grieving is done you will feel differently about him and will have learnt some invaluable life lessons making it SO much more likely you'll recognise someone better when they come along.
Meanwhile, have fun whenever you can even if laughter dissolves into tears occasionally.

@ginteaandponies

Yup, I can see all my furniture etc too which makes it hard. It just hit me that he removed any trace of us and every single photo for someone who 4 months ago said he never would as they were the happiest years of his life and whoever he got with would have to accept that