Trigger warning- detailed
This happened years back, I was 15 at the time and a virgin. My best friend at the time asked me to stay at hers, I told my mum and dad that’s where I was ( I assumed we’d be staying there) when she said let’s go to so and so’s house (she’d had quite a few sexual partners). Stupidly we went. He was 19 at the time, i remember him being very touchy with me which I said I didn’t want to have sex at the beginning of the night... He had bought vodka and I’d never even had a drink like that before. He was trying to force me to down my drink, I refused and he took me into his bedroom. He locked the door and said I couldn’t leave until I had downed the glass of vodka which I repeatedly refused. I went to leave but he had locked the door. He said I may as well stay as it was late and my mum and dad thought I was at my friends. He said I could sleep in his bed and he’d go into the living room. When I was in bed he came in trying it on, I refused and he had a big strop opened all the windows removed the blanket and said I’d have to be cold all night. I said I’ll just go and talk to my mum Say I’d had an argument with my friend but he kept the door locked. I kind of blanked out at this point all I remember was being on the bed and repeatedly saying no i don’t want to. I must’ve said it at least 20 times, but he didn’t stop. I must’ve been struggling as (tmi) but it wasn’t working. I froze and just let it happen after saying no. I wish I had done more and I’ve never told anyone any of this. At the time I shrugged it off, I’ve only ever slept with one other person (my OH) and often find myself tensing up and not enjoying sex even though I want to. My OH has been very understanding. Sorry if this is tmi