Am I an awful person?

[RunBoyRun]

I’ve been living with my DM for all of lockdown. She’s ok most of the time but we had an argument last night over something that I thought was very minor and she freaked out. Literally I had been watching the tv for 15 minutes and I picked up my iPad to quickly check my emails. She asked if I was watching it and I replied that I was and that she wasn’t going to get control of the remote to inflict her terrible programmes on me. This last part was a 100% a joke but she didn’t take it well at all.

She called me all the names under the sun. I’m a fucking bitch, an old bag, a fucking stuck up cow who irritates her just by breathing. I’m trying to control her by forcing her to watch my programmes on the tv. If anything happens to her it’s my fault due to stress etc. I asked her to calm down and she shouted she doesn’t want to calm down she wants to bully me and make my life a misery.

Anyway I apologised largely to keep the peace. Things were ok last night and this morning but now she has taken to her bed with a terrible headache and is shouting again at me.

Am I a bad daughter? Like would anyone else treat their adult daughter like this?

Why would you need to ask those questions. Which in themselves and given what you have written fully attribute blame for your mothers actions to your mother. She was and is clearly out of order. You were mildly irritating in the way people you live are.

She might not know it but she wants control of her living space. They only way she will get that is to live apart from you or bully you into submission.

You need to decide if you want control of your own living space. And whether you want to be bullied. I’m sure you don’t. The answer Is to tell her that and start supporting her moving out before the end of September.

I hate this too, husband puts tv on then hers lost in his phone! So we ask him which is he looking at as we would like to change over! Perhaps your mother is missing some of her soaps?

@Beautiful3 you might hate it but do you then call your DH a f-ing bitch etc? Or do you discuss it rationally?

I might be annoying - however I wanted to watch 45 minutes of tv. There were no soaps on last night that she watches. I rarely ever watch tv but one of my favourite programmes was on and I didn’t think it would end up like it did.

Can't she get a tv in her room? Start looking at warden assisted apartments for her.

Your house, your tv choices. That can run to letting her choose at times but if she doesn’t like it, she needs to leave or get herself a TV for her room. Can you cut back on the driving? And then read up on grey rock