Would you date a teacher?

[Claire926]

I have met a nice man who is starting a PGCE in September. I do not have a problem with teachers as I know some people believe they have a reputation. What my concerns are if I was to get in a relationship with him would he have time for a relationship? He would be working full time at school plus doing assignments. Also, would he always be working long hours with planning and marking etc after he graduates? I have heard it a stressful job and don't know if I could be with someone who has no time or the job ends up affecting their physical and mental health.

[Cheeseandwin5]

@Ginfizplease

Erm, what kind of reputation do teachers supposedly have?

This is exactly my first thought- I am so looking forward to the answer.

[chubbyhotchoc]

It depends on the subject and him. Most male teachers I know don't do a lot and tend to get away with it pretty well. It's the women that go over and above that run themselves into the ground, living and breathing it.

[Claire926]

@Elmer83

I think I can help on the reputation part...not saying I agree!
1: They have no grasp on the “real” world - I’ve heard this a few times, meaning they go straight from education to then working education.
2: Believe they are always right and can’t bear to be corrected - They are so use to be seeing as knowledgeable by kids they can come across arrogant to adults

1. Part-timers - Due to holidays (I hope parents experience of homeschooling during lockdown may change this opinion!) 🤣

Point 2 - Believe they are always right.

Now, this is not something I have said as I will speak to anyone who treats me with respect. HE actually said to me he find teachers believe they are always right and looked down on him when he did agency work.

I'm thinking how would his belief on this change when he qualifies? He will still need to interact with them. I also found his comment a bit judgy.

[Claire926]

@IveGotFrills

What's the subject OP? If humanities/Arts then lots of marking etc. but if STEM, less so. PE - fine

It will be a busy stressful couple of years but i'm sure he'll value your support and after that things do get easier.

The subject is Science.

I don't know how much would be involved in this.

[mnahmnah]

Every teacher is different, every school is different, therefore how much they work both at school and at home varies. Some schools demand a ridiculous amount. Some schools, like mine, are reasonable on work life balance. Some teachers find the job tougher and it takes them longer to plan and mark. Some departments, like mine, are a well-oiled machine with experienced staff which makes it all much more efficient and therefore less hours to work at home for all. Some people will commit 100% of their time and energy unnecessarily. It doesn’t make you a better teacher.

But, show me any job that is strictly 9-5 with no work at home or further expectations. Many jobs require long or anti-social hours far worse than a teacher’s. I have friends in other professions who are very much expected to be at work until later at night, to wine and dine clients, travel overnight etc. That would be far worse than dating a teacher.

[FizzyPink]

I always said I would never date a teacher due to my love of holidays/weekend mini breaks and them not being able to take time off work and everything being so expensive in school holidays.

DP is a professional sports coach and works 12+ hours a day 6 days a week Every holiday we have planned together has had to be either adjusted, changed slightly or cancelled due to his work commitments. I won’t lie, it’s the worst thing about him and incredibly frustrating but he redeems himself in other ways

[Flibbitygibbit]

Saw one for a few months . It’s a no from me 🤷‍♀️ My parents were teachers though !

[Piggywaspushed]

Don't worry OP , he isn't going to be in teaching long if he is already making negative comments about his more experienced colleagues !

[Heyha]

Oh he will DEFINITELY change his tune when he's in a school properly. I think the reason teachers get so maligned is because it's never like what most people think it is but you can only know that once you're doing it.

On the plus side, I'm science and I don't think I have as bad a workload as most others. Wordy subjects- massive marking load. Foundation subjects- loads of classes and less chance to get to know them. Science has a good balance of stuff to do (and mark) and you generally only have one or two classes per yeargroup which means you get the relationships built up quicker which helps with behaviour etc.

[Elmer83]

Regarding the “Believe they are always right” is from experience actually true. My in laws were teachers and they have great difficulty understanding a different opinion. God help you if you challenge them 🤣🤣 I’ve also friends who are teachers and are exactly the same. Luckily we are all aware of this common teacher trait and we just nod along and agree and then roll our eyes when they’re not looking 😂🙈

[VashtaNerada]

A good teacher values learning more than they value teaching @Elmer83 so hopefully you’ve just had bad luck with those ones! I love learning new things
This thread makes me think of ‘shrodinger’s immigrant’ who is both lazy and after your job (according to the right-wing press). Shrodinger’s teacher appears to be both lazy (not working hard enough during lockdown / finishing at three / long holidays) and overly hardworking (ignores family / constantly marking) at the same time according to the stereotypes!

[Xenia]

I am sure lots of teachers are humble and know they are wrong as much of the time as the rest of us. The problem for the spouse is the teacher is often on half or less of their pay and yet has much less flexibility to help out at home in many ways so it a pretty awful deal.

[user1497207191]

Few, if any professionals, have easy 9-5/M-F jobs. Long days, occasional weekend work, occasional evening work, replying to emails out of hours is pretty normal is most professional jobs.

[Elmer83]

@VashtaNerada

A good teacher values learning more than they value teaching *@Elmer83* so hopefully you’ve just had bad luck with those ones! I love learning new things
This thread makes me think of ‘shrodinger’s immigrant’ who is both lazy and after your job (according to the right-wing press). Shrodinger’s teacher appears to be both lazy (not working hard enough during lockdown / finishing at three / long holidays) and overly hardworking (ignores family / constantly marking) at the same time according to the stereotypes!

Yes, also I should have added I know a couple that aren’t like that too! Im going on the typical stereotypes people have of teachers and my own personal experience.
I’m in no bashing teachers. I think it’s the hardest, and highly stressful job. One I know I couldn’t do 😁

[LolaSmiles]

This thread makes me think of ‘shrodinger’s immigrant’ who is both lazy and after your job (according to the right-wing press). Shrodinger’s teacher appears to be both lazy (not working hard enough during lockdown / finishing at three / long holidays) and overly hardworking (ignores family / constantly marking) at the same time according to the stereotypes!

I find myself laughing at these sorts of threads because teachers seem to be whatever trait suits the argument.

Even the 'teachers think they are always right' is probably confirmation bias. I find a lot of people have certain topics that they get on their high horse about or talk lots about. It doesn't mean 'profession always thinks they're always right'.

[Piggywaspushed]

Shrodinger's Immigrant . Brilliant!

[OnyourOwn]

What sweeping statements about teachers. but this is my experience. ...
As Someone who was a teacher for 10 years and then went in to a 'normal' 9-5...having now experienced 3 jobs outside the realm of teaching I can tell you hands down teaching is beyond ridiculous when it comes to working all hours, commitments to working most if not all weekends, stuck with having to take leave at specific times only to pay 300% more in travel ...then when you get there you're surrounded by kids, some of which you may have taught.
My sister, one of my friends and a colleague all ended up on their holidays abroad bumping into kids they taught.
It can be soul destroying.
I miss my classroom and I miss the kids but wouldn't trade my job now.
I couldn't quite believe outside teaching you could go to the loo when needed and have a lunch break.
The problem is everyone went to school, everyone has had rubbish experiences as a kid with teachers so everyone is an expert.

Personally I wouldn't date a teacher because of the holidays and work load and pretty crappy pay.
Saying that my sister and her husband have a great life but they are both teachers.

[FinnyStory]

How do teachers manage to have "a reputation" and not have time for a personal life?

I teach. It's not 9-3 but it's no where near as many hours as some here would have you believe . It is restrictive for when you can have time off but then you do get a lot of it.

[urbanmist]

Science marking is all flick and tick. He’ll have plenty of time for you.

[Italiandreams]

Good teachers teach children it’s ok to make mistakes so a complete generalisation! I know a few non teachers who think they are always right. What an odd thread. I know lots of teachers, all completely different people.

[Elmer83]

Somebody asked what reputation teachers have and I gave an example of some of the reputations some people I’ve met think teachers have. As I stated I only have experience of the “believe they are always right with SOME teachers I know, not all. My husband also thinks he’s always right and he’s not a teacher he’s just a twat!
If you all read my original post you’ll note this.

[Elmer83]

I’d also like to add of course those points are a generalisation. It’s like all builders lear at big boobs and wolf whistle...of course they don’t, but it’s something people think off when they walk past a building site! None of my points were a personal attack! They are what some people think off when they think of teachers

[Elmer83]

Anyway, going back to OP’s original question. Yes I would date a teacher 👍🏼😂

[Lacey2019]

Teaching is a great profession & respected. I’d be more worried if he was a drug dealer etc!.

I earn over 50k a year as a teacher with good security and prospects

[CanadianJohn]

@Cuddling57

I don't think you can chose someone to love based on their occupation unless it's something like 'Torturer' so I guess that could be a teacher.

As in "we have ways of teaching you to speak..."