I have no friends

[CoffeeTeaCoffee]

Ok maybe I do but not many. And I guess the problem is I haven't made any new friends since school/university.

We had children earlier than the rest of our group. I didn't make any 'mum' friends. Our kids are primary aged now and now people are having babies/getting pregnant. Again our social lives aren't in sync.

I reach out to people but I feel they don't like me. I know I'm not unlikeable.

Just feeling a little 😑 at the moment.

Have you heard of meetup.com? You can join a group and then attend an event that's meant for like-minded people. You just have to make an effort to socialise and before you know it, you'll connect with someone x

I think it often comes down to whether you find your tribe or not. If you don't find your people then the best you can do is awkward acquaintances so there is an element of luck and I'm sure you're not unlikeable.

Have you tried making friends with some of the other school mums? I found having dcs friends round to play was a starting point then next time ask the parent to come in for coffee when they collect

All good suggestions. Thanks.
And yeah I don't think I've found my tribe...I seem to dip in and out of groups and sit on the perimeter.
It just feels lonely at times.
And I feel I'm always the one making the effort/plans with people. Not the other way.

I sympathise with you op ! It's hard to make new friends as an adult when it feels like everyone has their group already ! I'm in my late 20s have a baby and have moved quite far away from home etc but for some reason the women i try to make friends with try and give me advice all the time i dont want or need it really puts me off 😅

Coffeeteacoffee

Aw I can really relate to this. Im sorry your feeling like this 🌺
Lock down made me realise unless I try and make an effort I dont hear from anyone and noone makes that effort with me.
Im 34 and would love to have a good close friend for a glass of wine and natter mad moment and just be there for each other but just havnt had that luck.
I had nice friends but all loved awaybir abroad which I found very hard.
Ive a son who is 9 and we know acquaintances who we meet every few months. But id love that pick uo the phone kinda friend!
I always try hard but obviously isnt enough and then worry what it is with me. Makes me feel lonely and sad and question why!?
Your not alone hun xx

Im trying to find the confidence to go open water swimming and hope to meet like minded women. Be nice just to feel excepted. Is there a group you could join maybehiw are tou doing?

Sympathy to you. I know how it feels.

How is the vibe in your children's school? My son's first school was a small village school and we were not from there. I felt like an alien from day one. Things got much better after we moved to a new school where people are friendly and multi culture. We have made a few close friends and some nice well known acquittance through the school community.

Another thing I have tried was to join online community and see what's going on nearby. But this kind of group turn to be more casual and not for deep friendship. It still provided me a network and people I can share same interest with.

It's hard to make friends as adults and I think sometimes it's about finding your tribe. Good luck. The most important thing is that not to second guess yourself. We are all unique and will find someone we have common with.

I'm sorry you feel lonely. Do you go to work? I made friends at work, was not mad about the idea of having 'mum' friends when mine were small, in fact avoided that as much as possible. Obviously some of my dear friends whom I met at work were mothers but it wasn't the same, we had other things in our lives.

As time goes on, you will make a friend or two. Don't worry about it, it will just happen naturally.

Pianoanddrum
Aw thank you for your reply. Lovely to hear from you
Im pleased you have a nice little network. It must be so nice.
Were such a happy little family of 3 4 with our dog. But I just find noone is wanting a proper friendship but everyone around us does have that it is hard sometimes! We are not very outgoing more the kind have friends over for bbq drinks or picnic. I no I shouldnt question me but I really do as it does make you feel hurt.

The vibe was awful actually my son was really hurt in school and there was no connection very clicky. I cant be doing with clickyness lol.

Just would love another friend or family with same interest ya know!

Thank you I may see if there is a group local to us and hope for the best.

I do agree so hard as adult I hate it lolit do t help when you have mild anxiett and not confident 🤦‍♀️

Maggiesfarm
Hello thank you for your reply.

I only work one day at the moment as have my son but with elderly so noone else around which is also quite lonely.
When I worked full time I had a nice group but yes they have moved on places and I really miss them. I get the odd message here and there but they are living there new life! Which im so pleased for them.
Ive mainly 2 aquancuntances that only see me when suitable to them but not aclose friend that id love.

I hope so life can feel so lonely otherwise.
Be nice if I do have that.

Im going to try volunteering and see if that opens any doors

Thank you ladies have s lively day xxxx

Sounds like my situation. We had kids at 19 now at 40 our friends are just starting. So we aren't at the same stage of life. Still in contact but they find more in common with each other discussing mile stones and sleeping patterns etc... When we first started I was sure to not just talk about babies all the time and had them minded by my mum or left at home with husband to still go out etc. Now it's them it's all baby and kid focussed.
We are all still friends they just don't have the time they did before and don't seem interested in making time as I did and was expected to. In my stage of life working exclusively from home there isn't the option to meet people these days for new connections. I don't mind as much especially with covid there's a reason to stay home and not be social so it's fine but I get what you're going through.