Never doubt your gut....

[dramaqueenforlife]

If it’s telling you something always listen to it... it never lets you down and is always right.

I just hope the raw pain goes away.

I want to fast forward to the part where he isn’t consuming my thoughts 24/7.

I have had a similar thing recently and feeling better quicker than I expected. No contact with him. Fill your life with good people that "squeeze " the thoughts of him out. This seems to be better than trying to forget him. Notice how people leave you feeling. He left you feeling not nice. Spending time with friends who uplift me has been so good for putting my "loss" into perspective. He was just a lesson and the next one will be along once you are ready. Beating yourself up about it won't help. Be nice to yourself like how you'd talk to a friend.

Sorry OP!
Oh how I had listened to mine in the past...I would have saved myself a lot of pain

@Nicelunch25 good advice. It’s funny you say that as I think I have mentioned before after speaking to my bestie and an upsetting phone call with loads of tears to her she decided to make me laugh with some old memories. She has me howling with laughter at one point and they did make me feel good. Even managed to get a few hours sleep. I’ve working today which I’m glad I decided to do as was thinking of throwing a sickie which would have been the worst thing to do I think as I would have just wallowed in my pit. I know it’s only day 2 at the moment and I have a way to go yet as I’m still getting the punch in the stomach and feelings of nausea. I actually made myself laugh earlier as I thought I might lose some weight out of this as I have lost my appetite. Silver linings and all that.

And I know I keep saying it but thank you all for your words of encouragement.