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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Am I thinking too much into this

4 replies

TheJHD · 23/07/2020 09:12

Got a dilemma, my gf started to receive random messages from someone on Facebook about a month ago telling her that I’m not as perfect as I make out to be (I’ve never made out to be perfect ever). Initial thought was it’s the ex wife or her friend causing shit. So I said just block and delete pay no attention to it and they’ll get bored. Then yesterday she shows me a list of other messages that had been sent from the same person over the past few weeks, she’s never replied to any of them but they are all sent at the same time of a evening and when I’m child free alone at home.
Here’s my dilemma, I sent these to my ex hoping to confront her yet she proved it wasn’t her but picked up on one thing that was said, that my ex’s left me because of my “addiction to ***” I don’t have any addictions and no one has left me because of it, the only person who has ever said that is my gf because I don’t want to spend everyday with her. So reading back on these messages makes me think it’s her sending them to herself to create drama. How would you confront this?

OP posts:
HollowTalk · 23/07/2020 09:19

Ooooh interesting! Great twist at the end!

LuluBellaBlue · 23/07/2020 09:33

I’d speak to her and call her out on it

Thingsdogetbetter · 23/07/2020 11:43

What makes you think it's your gf sending them to herself other than the addiction comment?

When did gf say something about addiction? Before the messages started or after? If before, it's possible that the poster is known to her and has suggested this in the past or gf said it to them, and gf just hasn't joined the dots to this person.

Doing this to create drama is very psycho behaviour. How long have you been together? Are there anyone other red flags that indicate gf is unstable? Did anything happen just before messages start?

TheJHD · 23/07/2020 15:48

@Thingsdogetbetter About 9, 10 months now. Normally the messages come when I’m at home alone. The addiction comment did make me think it is someone close to her yet she has a very small circle of friends. She has mentioned it a couple of times to me and no one else ever has plus little other things are said in the messages which we’ve had a discussion about the day or two before.
There has been a few other “dramatic” incidents which came out of nowhere so add these in I’m thinking there’s more into this.

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