How long do you wait before it's an official relationship ?

[EvePolastri938]

Just thinking of my own previous experiences and those of friends. It always seems to be 'how to ask the guy where it's going without seeming needy' and it often seems to be the man who calls the shots in that regard.

People who are looking for a committed, boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, how long would you wait ? I remember last year a guy telling me he was 'not sure' about being official after 6 months of knowing me.
Not sure why it should take several months to know, you're entering into a relationship, not marriage ?

I met my DH online and we chatted for two weeks before meeting up. We then dated for around 6 weeks before he asked me to make it official although I hadn't spoken to anyone else online since our first meeting as I just didn't have any interest, I really liked him.
It's now been 6 years and we are married with 2 little boys who are 2 and 6 months

I really don't think there's any set pattern or timescales.

its an individual thing. For me, i'd be expecting exclusivity soon after i'd slept with them for the first time. I don't share my lovers with other women.

@EvePolastri938

Just thinking of my own previous experiences and those of friends. It always seems to be 'how to ask the guy where it's going without seeming needy' and it often seems to be the man who calls the shots in that regard.

People who are looking for a committed, boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, how long would you wait ? I remember last year a guy telling me he was 'not sure' about being official after 6 months of knowing me.
Not sure why it should take several months to know, you're entering into a relationship, not marriage ?

My impression from reading the masses of threads on MN is that this is because many women are keen to put a label on things whereas many men usually just carry on without too much thought . I would go with how someone is behaving and by what they say . However depending on your age I can see why people may wish to put a time limit on something.

About 2 weeks with 1st husband. About 15 years of on and off fwb with 2nd. Still happily together after 10 official years.

Who knows with 3rd 😂😂😂

I told him I was going to start referring to him as my boyfriend after a month of dating. We had known eachother for 9 months.

With my husband pretty much straight away...we both knew. Didn't even talk about it.
With my boyfriend now...about I can't remember...about 3 months maybe? But that was him asking me to be exclusive. I was like what does does mean, I'm not sleeping with anyone else. But he's like in his 30s so way younger....maybe that's what young people do. 🤷

I think after about 6 weeks when we started meeting each other’s friends; I joked that I didn’t know how to introduce him and he said well how about as your boyfriend. It meant it wasn’t a big serious conversation and I was pretty sure that’s where we were anyway from meeting each other’s friends

DP and I weren't 'official' for 6 months

My husband and I never had the conversation but I stayed over one night about a month in and never went home!

I think that men know pretty quickly if you are girlfriend potential or not. All the successful long-term couples that I know got things 'official' pretty fast because they knew they had found the right person.

I would be suspicious of someone who just keeps things casual after a couple of months. If you are still asking yourself after six months where you are standing then I would say the answer was always pretty obvious that the other person was keeping their options open...

If you are dating online especially, don't just date one person. Keep your own options open until they make more of a commitment.

If you are someone who is at a stage where you want a family and are looking for a partner, don't let guys wastes months of your life. It is not 'needy' to state what your needs and expectations are. Don't let a guy 'call the shots' in your life...