Talking to a man (old) who is much better looking than me!

[Gose]

I've recently begun OLD. There's one man who is (IMO) really good looking, and to be completely honest, I don't know why he's messaging me! I think he's really handsome, very cool, seems nice - and seems keen!

I can't work out why he'd be interested in me! How do I get over my inferiority complex, and does anyone else ever feel this way?!

From past experience... is it actually him?

Ah - good point lout! How would I find out? Clueless about all this sort of stuff!

Once you exchange numbers, maybe ask him to send you a selfie? You might be able to judge if it's really him....or if you have his full name check FB, Twitter etc. to see if you can find more photos.

Save his image on your phone / laptop then do a reverse image search on bing or google ?

Yeah try a reverse image search - also become a google detective. Search for him on Facebook etc.

So many men use fake pics, maybe don't ask for a selfie though as you might get a dickpic.

Can’t you just video call before meeting, wouldn’t that be easier totally normal to want to check who they are before meeting

Catfish.

He will be using his best pictures but that doesn't mean he's totally catfishing you.
You'll find out if you meet him. Have some more confidence in yourself though.

What’s a reverse image search? I’ve never heard of this before.

Always ask for a proof of life photo. Decent men do not mind, at all. They know that womem have to be safe

@sofato5miles what on earth is a proof of life photo?!

[quote Russell19]@sofato5miles what on earth is a proof of life photo?![/quote]
I’d assume a photo with maybe today’s newspaper or something? So it can’t be faked.

I had this once, he literally looked like a model. He wasn't a catfish but turned out to be a right weirdo.

Use facetime, skype or whatever to video chat with him.

As well as the possibility of it being someone else's picture, be mindful that it might be genuine but out of date.

However, exercise caution and see what happens. Your lack of confidence might mean you are underestimating your own qualities. If you make sure you meet him safely, don't give away more contact details than you have to and absolutely don't respond to any requests to lend him money in any way, shape or form, you have nothing to lose by finding out whether he is as good as he seems.

I had a guy show a completely different person's pic one time. Also another who showed one making him looking very different from how he normally looked. Plus he was stunningly handsome in the other pic too. So yes it can be very misleading.

Do a FaceTime call.

Interesting one, I think sometimes you can tell by the quality of the photograph. person looks too perfect, like a model with perfect white teeth.
That aside, although confident in real life I do find myself feeling I do not match up if someone vaguely handsome gets in touch, even though I am definitely not a minger. Unfortunately I only seem to attract mingers.

Through OLD, I have met a very good looking guy. His photos looked like a model's and when we went to whatsapp, his number was a Malta-based number. Basically, everything pointed to him being a catfish. I met him for a coffee and he looked exactly like his photos but we had zero chemistry. Sod's law!

I have also recently met through OLD, a man who looked 10 years older than his photos and also he had put quite a lot of weight on. His profile pics were either older or taken from very flattering angles.

So I don't think you can tell. BUT both those first meetings were in a public place and a coffee. You just need to exercise caution whether the guy is a looker or not.

If you have exchanged numbers then ask for a facetime call.
Or Zoom or some such thing.
Should be easy enough.

Us women (mostly) put ourselves down about our looks. Maybe he's just a good looking guy! I met mine at work but if we had met on OLD I would have thought the same. I'm quite attractive but my partner is a mega hotty 😅. Luckily he has the personality to match. I think it's always a good idea to have a quick video chat before meeting though.

DP is a physically fit, very good looking 33 year old who was living on his own in a lovely city apartment and had a great job/life as far as I could tell. I am 41, divorced with 3 DC's, live in a rural village and have lived through a fair amount of trauma and i am a natural whinger.

I used to be good looking in my 20's and 30's but I have put on a bit of weight (size 12-14) and had a hard decade so haven't aged that well. I only really remember that DP is good looking when we meet new people (women) and they go all swoony. I think he is gorgeous because of him - he is funny, kind and extremely tolerant and understanding of me. He likes me because he says I am interesting and I like walking, going to gigs and politics, so does he. We wear similar clothes. He calls me pretty but i don't believe him haha. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder I guess. Even really good looking people need someone who they connect with and often that is more important isn't it? There are plenty of good looking women out there that DP would run a mile from (he doesn't go for over made up, tanned women at all). It doesn't always match up that good looking people only go out with physically attractive people, I would focus on how you feel about him when you meet up OP.

Thank you so much for all your replies. Been chatting via the app again tonight, and have swapped numbers. I'll report back!

Keep us updated OP