help me please-desperate

[allnamesaretaken]

dont even know why i am starting this i dont have enough time to write everything down

i am so depressed and need someone to talk to.

am so fed up of being ignored for days on end by dh, i really really cant take this anymore. he is upstairs just now so i may cut of at anypoint.

what happened to the lovely man i married, why does he hate me so much

i cant handle being ignored for days on end and dont know what to do about it, i want to leave him really i do but i dont have it in me

Hi

Maybe he is feeling depressed and at a loss as to what to do or how to handle things.

Maybe, the fact he works away all week plays a big part in all this. Does he 'slot' back in easily when he is at home? I wonder if he feels a bit of a stranger in his own home (for want of a better expression) at the weekends and in his efforts to feel like part of the team, a hands on dad, he over asserts himself when it comes to reprimanding the kids.

If he is a great husband and father for most of the weekend and the ignoring you only starts on a saturday evening, it could be that he is withdrawing from you in an effort to make leaving you easier for himself.

I'm not excusing his behaviour by the way, just looking for possible reasons behind it

hey how you doing? hope you are well and aren't feeling so bad.

You need a book called "Why does he do that - Inside the minds of angry and controlling men" by Lundy Bancroft. Available from Amazon or Play.com. Obviously I don t know you or DH but just from what I read about him I recognised a lot of characteristics from this book.

If you can t leave him alone with your kids then there is a big problem. Ignoring you is a form of emotional abuse. Please please get this book. I can t tell you how much it has helped me and my DH does not sound half as bad as yours. My DH did not even realise what he was doing half the time until I took to following him around reading him paragraphs from the book. All I knew was that a lot of what he said and did made me feel like Crap and then he would tell me I was over reacting making me feel like I was going nuts. It helped me to articulate what I was feeling and reassured me that it was NOT me.

I hope you are feeling better and things have calmed down for you a bit.