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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Working from home - dh clingy

18 replies

Unconquerable · 19/07/2020 18:03

Just wondering if any of you has a dh who is working from home and has become quite clingy. Mine has.

Today I asked him to watch the children while I cooked. He just took the children to the kitchen and watched me cook while asking questions about what I was doing and didn’t leave until I told him several times.

I think he is missing his social contacts and entertainment at work. Always wants to be entertained.

I am an independent woman and he used to work away from home/travel a lot.

It’s a bit odd.

OP posts:

cuntryclub · 19/07/2020 18:08

Clingy? Sounds like he cba watching the kids.

cuntryclub · 19/07/2020 18:08

Clingy? Sounds like he cba watching the kids.

allthedamnvampires · 19/07/2020 18:09

In what other ways has he become clingy? There's nothing like enough info here.

Original poster

Unconquerable · 19/07/2020 18:12

@allthedamnvampires He just follows me around and is waiting to be entertained. Just sits there and comments on what I am doing, sometimes helps but often is in the way to be honest.

OP posts:

tigger001 · 19/07/2020 18:14

So when he finished work he followed you into the kitchen to have a conversation with you and you told him multiple times to leave, probably need more info about it.

Is he clingy in other ways ?

Original poster

Unconquerable · 19/07/2020 18:14

He wants to convince me to watch boring guy movies with him, wanted me to join him working out. Seems bored and waiting to be entertained.

I really love to have him around but sometimes he is just too clingy.

OP posts:

Original poster

Unconquerable · 19/07/2020 18:24

@tigger001 Yep, he followed me into the kitchen wanted to have a chat. He + children were standing in the way.
So I asked him to leave and take the kids somewhere else but he just sat down on the floor and continued to chat me up and be in the way. We have four kids Andover kitchen is not that big.

OP posts:

Interestedwoman · 19/07/2020 18:55

I can imagine exactly what you mean OP. It would annoy me to hardly ever have my own space/be able to get on with things.

Chatting to an OH is one thing but if they followed you around all the time it'd be annoying.

Original poster

Unconquerable · 19/07/2020 18:57

Exactly this. I am not used to this because he used to be away from home so much and I got used to it.

OP posts:

Original poster

Unconquerable · 19/07/2020 19:11

Don’t want to be impolite and tell him to go away all of the time. So I often ask him to get me a cup of tea or whatever.

WWYD?

OP posts:

TW2013 · 19/07/2020 19:17

Can you arrange for him to meet up with some other people. DH sometimes takes the dc to meet up with their friends and he has a chat for a few hours with their dads.

Original poster

Unconquerable · 19/07/2020 19:19

He currently doesn’t go out much and/or meet people because of the pandemic.
He is a bit worried about the virus + has a preexisting condition. He doesn’t want to be taking any chances with Covid.

OP posts:

Runkle · 19/07/2020 19:23

Men can't win can they 😂 MN is usually full of men spending too much time working and/or on hobbies.
Sounds like he's just enjoying spending more time with you and absorbing your daily life. Put some music on and sing loudly and dance badly, he'll soon stop chatting if you can't hear him.

Original poster

Unconquerable · 19/07/2020 19:39

My father used to work/travel a lot and I grew up used to it. Dh used to travel a lot before the pandemic. He used to commute to work and work long hours.
I got so used to not having him around. I know that sounds horrible and I don’t mean it to sound that way....
But he has a talent for always standing in the way keeping me from doing my chores.

OP posts:

Newbiehere123 · 19/07/2020 22:40

Hahaha he sounds exactly like mine but mine is more weird. I ask him to watch out for DS as I need the loo and next minute he actually comes in with DS chatting to me or if I need a shower they will come in together and watch me. DS is 15 months btw

Newbiehere123 · 19/07/2020 22:40

Candyflosscookie · 19/07/2020 23:18

God that would drive me insane. I have a dog that follows me around, that's more than enough. I'd just ban them from the kitchen for "safety" and whack up the music.

Original poster

Unconquerable · 20/07/2020 08:09

@Newbiehere123

Mine sometimes follows me into the shower and wants to chat and doesn’t understand my need for privacy... and I cannot really explain it too him. Dh does not mind people chatting with him while he is having a shower. Probably a gender thing. I don’t know. I also don’t know how to explain it to him. Why do I mind? I don’t know.

OTOH he gives me privacy at the loo... and needs privacy there. He has chronic constipation and needed to rely on laxatives for traveling but now trying without.
So he sometimes even asked me to leave the house/take the children for a walk because he needed the loo.
However if we are in the house I think we both wish he could have more privacy at the loo... and it’s a bit odd... if he is at the loo and someone makes a sound and he doesn’t know what it is or someone says something he is feeling watchful and trying to figure out watch’s going on which makes his constipation worse.
So we both wish he could have more privacy there.

OP posts:

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