Social Media Porn following

[cosmicbabe]

Hello,
So my OH seems to follow a lot of porn across social media platforms. Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat... From what I can see he doesn't actively 'like' any of these posts but does follow the pages

Now I don't mind porn use (pornhub ect) but didn't really know you can also follow porn sites / porn models across social media and I'm not sure how I feel about that, or is this now the norm? We are both early 40's, have only been together just over a year and I have not dealt with this before in a relationship...

He sounds like a creep sorry to be blunt but if you have no boundaries then he's going to push them as far as he can.
He's the kind of guy that perves on women all the time and it seems he doesn't really take your feelings seriously, watch out for plenty of RL women that he doesn't talk about on sm too.

Bleugh. I wouldn't find this an attractive quality in a man.

Doesn't matter what other people do or don't mind.

All that matters is whether you are ok with it or not. If you're not, you need to address it, make your boundaries clear and if he doesn't want to respect them then that's his decision and you need to end the relationship.

You're both adults with agency over your own behaviour, if you're not ok with something and it makes you feel shit then it doesn't matter if other people would or wouldn't be ok with it.

For me it wouldn't be a matter of having a conversation with him 'oh I don't like you following those accounts.'

Based on my sleazy exes, I would be making a judgement about his personality based on him following those. It's a red flag for me and I would be keeping even more of an eye on how he is when it comes to sex.

Any sign of unpleasant pressure and I will bin someone anyway, but pressurizing is how I'd fear things would go with someone this into porn/sex.

Ah ok sorry I probably need to sleep lol.

If you've been with him over a year how has he been? Does he nag for sex excessively, or is he ok?

Apart from the social media he's actually the nicest man I've met. My ex wasn't into social media but cheated on me a few times and continues to cheat on his now GF..

He's also very normal in the bedroom. The best lover I've had actually. Very kind and thoughtful. He's not sleazy at all in person.

I'll speak to him and ask

*Doesn't matter what other people do or don't mind.

All that matters is whether you are ok with it or not. If you're not, you need to address it, make your boundaries clear and if he doesn't want to respect them then that's his decision and you need to end the relationship.

You're both adults with agency over your own behaviour, if you're not ok with something and it makes you feel shit then it doesn't matter if other people would or wouldn't be ok with it.*

This ^^

Personally this would turn me off immediately and I'd lose all respect for him, but porn is a massive no-no for me.
It's just all a bit sad and grim IMO

Decide how you feel about it, set your boundaries with him and if he crosses those then be prepared to end the relationship