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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Wife - I love you not in love with you

10 replies

lmwghb · 13/07/2020 12:28

Wife and I have been together for 22 years and married for 11 and we have two grown up children. I'm 37 and shes 39.

Around beginning of April I felt my wife becoming distant from me and I eventually asked her what was going on with us. At this point she says that we needed time apart and with little discussion she moved out. Next day she calls and tells me that we're not getting back together that she has feelings for someone else. Surprise surprise its someone she works with and is 13 years her senior (if that even matters).

So I went into melt down as you do and I pleaded and begged and done all the stupid things that I know know not to do, she came back for a week and it was a disater I was trying too hard and she moved back out and was adamant it was over.

A few months later (mid-June) she says she wants to try again and we make it through two weeks this time. We ended up in an argument as I felt that she was not putting in the effort and that I was the one doing all the trying and she left again. The second time she came back she said that she felt her feelings came back and she stopped seeing a future with this guy but of course that now seems to have reversed.

All the while throughout this turmoil she has been on/off (with the exception of the times she came back to me) she has been seeing and texting this co-worker who she has been texting since around Dec/Jan. I know from the times she has been away that they have been physical (she told me).

Of course throughout this time we've managed to talk and I understand now she has been feeling taken for granted (she was dealing with all the bills) and I was a spender and she hated that and she felt it would never change. I've completley aknowledged how shes feeling about that and how she felt that may have been a hopeless situation and that she'd hoped that it would change and it didn't. I understand words are not enough so to show her things could change I sold a lot of gadgets etc that I bought and paid off existing debts and I have started to save but right now it seems the situation is impossible and with her telling me its over I have no choice but to accept this. I really have seen the mistakes I've made and I am implimenting true change but from where she is it seems she can't recall anything good about our marriage, its all negitive and it seems I am all to blame.

I may be in the denial stage but we've been together since I was 15 and she was 17 and I just feel in the pit of my stomach that she is being carried away by the possibilities of this new man. She can still be very affectionate with me and said that she still fancies me.

From my point of view I know we can't work on the marriage unless she wants to and I know we can't do anything until she stops seeing this new man. So do I just let go for now and simply hope that things change down the line (I know I need to look after myself as well).

I'll end with I love this woman with all my heart despite the pain I have felt that last few months.

OP posts:
Choppedupapple · 13/07/2020 12:59

You are trying so hard but it seems that she isn’t, your self esteem will take a battering if this continues. Have you asked why she wants to try again? I think you need to dig into that further, it may be hurtful though. Has the other man rejected her?

Have you considered couples counselling? Relate are doing online?

lmwghb · 13/07/2020 13:03

Sorry I should make it clear that right now she has decided that we're over and it seems she is "dating" this other man.

At this stage she has not said she wants to try again.

OP posts:
SpillTheTeaa · 13/07/2020 13:10

She's playing you like a fiddle and you need to cut her off for your own mental health. She sounds toxic and is just using when things don't go right with her new lover. Her lovey dovey stage won't last forever but I wouldn't wait and see and be second best.

SpillTheTeaa · 13/07/2020 13:11

We all know the chances of these people who have affairs the chance of them staying faithful is slim. And in most cases the people having the affair get together then they or their partner cheat again and come running back.

namechange12a · 13/07/2020 13:57

OP there's a forum you might find useful called Surviving Infidelity.

Choppedupapple · 13/07/2020 14:16

Think about what your future without her looks like? There will be happy times for you with someone else. Stay close to your children.

Find your anger, she’s treated you really, really badly. File for divorce online?

Lozzerbmc · 13/07/2020 14:24

I think you should be angry she has treated you appallingly. It will get better i know it doesnt feel like it but you will get over it. Take one day at a time. She may want to come back when it doesnt work out by she will only leave again causing you more pain

blisstwins · 13/07/2020 14:45

read chumplady.com She is being so selfish and unfair. Problems within your marriage are completely different from what she has done and nothing justifies an affair. I am so sorry you are going through this.

lmwghb · 13/07/2020 15:00

The problem also is she doesn't see this as having an affair :-( it seems that they where just texting as "friends" and then expressed feelings for each other in work. Once that was done all hell broke loose and she left and shes said that they only ever slept together when we where seperated and not together. Albeit we are still married and it all happened within weeks of our seperation!

OP posts:
Valkadin · 13/07/2020 16:52

She planned this and you need to walk away. What’s happening is she is basically keeping all options open. Both you and he are an option.

They were having an emotional affair and she had checked out emotionally a while ago.

So your kids are young adults and financially independent.

Time to walk away, do some healing and do not leap in to any relationship for a few months at least.

I thought my childhood sweetheart would be a forever thing. We lasted till we were 28. I spent a year single and it was the best thing I ever did.

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