Hi, I'm a first time user of mums net and would love to hear others opinions of my situation. I am married for 13 years with 3 kids, oldest 11. Over the past number of years my husband has become increasingly difficult to live with. He is always grumpy, flies off the handle over the smallest of things and belittles the children, especially our oldest. I think he has mental health issues but he won't try to get help. Before our 3rd child was born we split up for about 6 months. He was drinking excessively (about 4 nights a week, usually a full bottle of vodka). He was constantly in and out of work and hated the world!! With 2 young children I reached breaking point and asks him to leave. He promised he would stop drinking and we worked though our issues and we got back together. His drinking stopped mid week but he still had his drink at weekends, which tbh I didn't mind. We were happy for a few years and we had a 3rd child. But over the past 2/3 years things have been getting increasingly worse. He was back drinking 4 nights a week, hated the world, everyone is good for nothing in his eyes, he is paranoid that everyone is out to get him and if something goes wrong it's because of him and he's not meant to be happy! He also seems to have a pick on the children.. he never seems to be happy with all the children at the same time, he has to be picking on one. It seems our oldest is usually at the end of it. Particularly during lockdown this has been very evident. As the children have had no school there has been very little routine in our house. We are both keyworkers so worked throughout. Home schooling just didn't happen despite my best efforts, but this was all left to me as husband is not academic! I just didn't have the energy to homeschool when working full-time so I didn't push it. When husband returned from work, if the house was messy with dishes etc he flew off the handle and shouted at kids. I dread coming home from work because I never knew what mood he would be in. He also never wants to do anything together. He won't go out for meals or to socialise and he hates people (his words). He never used to be like that, he was always very outgoing and was the life and soul of any party. I can see things returning to the way they were before we split and I'm not even sure I want to fight for us anymore. I feel he has sucked the life and energy out of me and my priority now is for the children. The only reason I would be staying with him is for the sake of the children and an easy life. But it's not an easy life for me!!