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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Lockdown and disconnect from partner?

3 replies

Flowersinthewindowstill · 12/07/2020 18:23

Hi all, I posted a thread the other day about how I've been suffering depression/anxiety since lockdown and haven't really improved since things have eased. I finally saw my boyfriend after four months apart last weekend and whilst I enjoyed the time with him, I wasn't as overwhelmed with happiness as I thought I'd be. We've had a few tough times in the relationship in the past, but everything had been rosey until lockdown. He's done nothing wrong but I seem to have just stopped enjoying life full stop. I'm living alone at the moment (had flatmates but they moved home after lockdown) and I felt really depressed when he left as I was used to having company again. We spoke on the phone plenty during lockdown, so I wouldn't say the connection was diminished, but I do feel different and I've never felt like this before. I don't want to end the relationship but I'm worried about where this terrible gloomy feeling has come from. We're long-distance anyway but usually see each other every 2-3 weeks. If I'm on the phone with him or with him I feel fine, but since him staying with me I've been worried and questioning everything.

Has anyone else experienced this following time apart? Will trying to see each other more help?

It's worth saying that NOTHING is exciting me at the moment. If you told me I'd won the lottery I think I'd struggle to be enthusiastic. I've been jobless for three months and finally got another job. I was happy for about an hour but then back to doomsday. Equally all my favourite things... films, books, writing, days out, all fail to fill me with any kind of excitement. I feel like an empty shell. I don't know if it's just having excess time on my hands that has caused this. I'm hoping once I start my job next week the old me might start to come back. If not I think I'm going to have to seriously look into antidepressants or some kind of therapy.

OP posts:
Windmillwhirl · 12/07/2020 18:58

You sound clinically depressed. A lot of what you are feeling and experiencing points to that. Maybe see a GP or invest in some therapy

litterbird · 12/07/2020 19:45

Please phone your GP practise tomorrow. Your GP will take you through a series of questions which will determine if you are depressed. You can also go to the NHS and look at Good To Talk which is the talking therapy site if you think you might need to talk to someone. What you are explaining in your posts sounds like depression but your doctor will diagnose that and give you help and medication to assist you through this. You can and will feel better with help OP. Good luck x

Flowersinthewindowstill · 12/07/2020 19:59

Thank you. I will call them tomorrow. I think working again will hopefully help a lot, but it may not be the sole answer so I definitely think I need medical advice and/or treatment. Even when bad things have happened to me in the past I've always been able to find a positive and get through it. But this is a totally alien feeling. Sad

OP posts:
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