Younger friend makes age related comments

[Abitannoying]

I have a friend who is 20 years younger than me whom I get on well with, and I think she is a lovely person.

However practically every time I speak to her she manages to make comments relating to my age. Examples:

I should ask my dc to show me how to do something on the Internet.

Things were different dating wise in “my time”. She uses that phrase - in “your time”.

She has a 41 year old friend whom she says is “still attractive” - that 41 year old friend is 10 years younger than me.

She makes a lot of comparisons and draws parallels between me and a client of hers who is older than me - between 10 and 20 years older - regarding computer literacy for example. Not saying she should be making these comments about her client either.

Maybe I am being over sensitive? I find myself bracing myself for the comments now.

Disclaimers - I realise I might be over sensitive. I also know that of course I am a lot older than my friend. And, nothing wrong with any age, but I don’t like the assumptions she appears to make. Regarding computer literacy, attractiveness, and general pigeon holing / generalisations.
I really don’t need my dc to explain the very simple IT thing she was talking about.

I guess I find her somewhat patronising and I am not sure how to respond.

Thanks for all the interesting messages.

Now, I don't see why she necessarily needs to point these things out randomly, but, in context, she's not wrong.

Yes exactly - if I want to ask my dc how to do something I will - a. I didn’t want to use a hotspot and b. I don’t know why she said I should ask my dc how to do it?? All of that was unprompted. None of it came from me.

I don’t have anywhere near the computer knowledge that some people have on this thread, but like most people my age I am extremely comfortable around computers. Why wouldn’t I be? It’s weird to be boxed into a category by her, and the more I think about it the more annoyed I get .

I know dating has changed - it’s the reference to “your time” which is galling - what, am I dead?

I am meeting up with her in a week and now I don’t really want to - even though in many ways she is perfectly nice.

But yeah I agree that it is a sign of her immaturity / tactlessness.

If you are friends, you should meet her and see how you feel in person. The second she makes an age-related jibe, say something that suits your personality. As I mentioned upthread, both of my mates who used to do that stopped after one semi-jovial semi-serious retort by me. Life’s too short to put up with that kind of nonsense. But I also think life is too short to write off Friends based on one flaw (if they are otherwise cool, that is). Every single one of my friends & I have flaws & we overlook things about one another & call each other up on it if it’s important enough. Good luck OP. I hope your hook-up with her goes well.

I wouldn’t see this person as a friend. More of a frenemy. They’re not worth the time imo.