Hi, I would really appreciate some help and advice about my girlfriends ex and her wanting to stay friends with him.
We have known each other over two years now, we lived over 200 miles apart and I moved to her area in Feb 2019 to be with her.
We met online while I was still married and living with my wife at the time, I realised that I wasn't happy and moved out of the family home in August 2018.
She split up with her ex in May 2017 after only being together 3 or 4 months, from what she told me it was quite intense and he actually proposed to her after a couple of months, she now says it was just a drunken joke.
We visited each other between March and October 2018 and got really close. We fought in early October and she says she needed commitment from me and it wasn't working being so far apart. I was gutted.
She texted me late one Saturday at the end of October saying she missed me and we started talking, it turned out later that her and her ex, who lives closer to her, had been messaging and they got back together in mid October.
We decided to try again in November and we travelled more frequently back and forth, it was hard but she was worth it.
She was still in contact with him but I didn't know that then. We talked about being together properly and I actually started to look into the logistics etc
She came to stay with me in Feb 2019 for a weeks holiday and it was brilliant. One of the nights she drunkenly admitted that they had been talking and had planned to meet up, I told her if she wanted him then she could leave and go to him. She got upset and said she was sorry and wants me only
I moved down in Feb 2109, got my own place and job and we had some great times
Unfortunately he would pop up every do often, they were texting each other at 1 30 in the mor when I was laying in bed next to her, I woke up a f asked her who she was texting and her reaction was to turn away and ignore me, I got annoyed when she admitted who it was and I went home, I found out later they continued their chat after I left, although she showed me the text it was the time and the reaction that annoyed me
He also called her up drunk one Saturday night when inwasn't there and declared his undying love and wanting her to come out drinking with him, knowing she was in a relationship with me, she told me the following day and I did go ballistic and told her to get rid of him.
It's went downhill from there, we fight all the time about him, she says he is just a friend and I need to stop controlling her
Any advice would be really helpful