Childish partner

[msxalex]

Just wanted some external advice. My partner of 6 yrs (37) suffers from rheumatoid arthritis, chronic fatigue, depression and is on the autistic spectrum. These are all obstacles that as a couple we manage, it's not easy but we do love each other. He also has zero other family.
Here's my problems though...
He refuses to leave the bed at all, refuses any family gathering with my very close family and worst of all which I'm finding increasingly impossible is his relationship with my 15 Yr old son.
My son is a teen that absolutely pushes boundaries, his hormones are wild he's also ASD. My son and partner are either great together or horrific. At the moment after a flare up my partner is refusing point blank to speak to my son and its making our home life very uncomfortable.
My partner won't Speak at all and if I bring up his behaviour he rants and sulks for days.
It's getting harder by the day
Any advice x
I'm 43 he's 37 BTW
Thanks for reading

No advice but .

I’m not sure what advice we could give you. Your household sounds toxic and your existence miserable. The obvious thing to do would be to leave him. This isn’t a good example of a relationship and parenting to your son

You have so many different issues it's difficult to separate them. First of all , I've had a 15 year old son with autism and it's horrendous. The hormones mixed with stress made that one of the hardest times of my life. That was a few years ago and it's evened out a lot , so some hope there.

Your partner has long term chronic illnesses that add up to a miserable time for him , and it sounds like he is taking it out on you and your son .

It all just adds up to misery. But each of you may be more miserable on your own.

I think you need to decide firstly if your partner is abusive at all to you or your son. Decision made if he is. If he isn't then you need to properly think this through.

Why is he refusing to leave the bed OP? Is it due to chronic fatigue or a flare of arthritis or the depression or a combination of both or because he's being stubborn?

Has he actually had an autism diagnosis or is this an 'educated guess' based on his behaviour?

What's the problem with having family over? Is it because he's introverted? Not feeling well and just wants some peace and quiet?

The ranting and sulking could be because of the autism or because he's controlling and doesn't like to be challenged. It's difficult to tell.