Who gets what in this mess

[iamtheoneandonlyyy]

I've posted 8 million times but in summary I've returned from refuge with my kids.
The dad has left the property. It's rented, the landlord is happy for me to stay.
I've been facilitating contact for the kids and they are fine.
He was generally being ok but now he's realised I'm not going back all bets are off.
He's supposed to be collecting his belongings tomorrow.
He's now added to his list of things to put outside for him:
Washing machine
Fridge
Children's tv
Sofa
Rug
All chairs
Kettle
Microwave
Toaster
And you get the idea, literally everything.
I've found out since returning that he's put us into 5000 debt and hidden it from me.
I just don't know what I can do. Most of our things were bought second hand and now that I'm lone parent to 3 I can't afford to replace the entire house of things as well as pay debts accrued.
I won't be giving him anything that was a gift to the kids I just won't.
What's best to do? I'm very lost and confused, people around me are angry and I just want what's best for the children.

Fuck that. Tell him to jog on.

Are the locks changed just in case he tries to gain access?

Leave his personal stuff outside and call the police if he starts.

Set up an email address and tell him to contact you on that only. Block him everywhere else.

You're liable for the debt he caused and he wants to see the kids go without. What a prize this man is

Hahaha these replies are making me feel better. Thankyou

Hi. OP.
Sorry I haven't read the whole thread yet (I will). Don't let him have the washing machine ! Call the police if he comes round and starts causing trouble.
If you are anywhere near Berkshire (and know anyone with a large van) I have two sofas going spare, not new but big, not bad and very comfy. I can spare a kettle and toaster and some baking tins. (I would need to give them a wipe first as they have been in cupboard for ages, but they are OK and work) also got quite a few kids toys if any use. All free. PM me if these might be any use to you.
Well done for initially getting out and not taking any more shit. 💐

Thank you that's incredibly kind
I'm a bit far away but I'm going to try and keep most of the things that the children use like the fridge etc.
I appreciate the offer so much though, thank you

You are so welcome.
Take care.

He's doing it to hurt you. He doesn't want or need anything he has asked for.

Has he even got good own place or has he gone back to Mommy?

I think you can guess lol. Seriously though yes at his mums.

Legally you can keep anything you want, if he wants it then he needs to take you through court for it (which he most likely won’t) so give him his clothes and other bits like that and leave them outside.

Make sure all locks are on and windows locked, let people know what time he’s coming and stick the kids so I with snacks and film and be ready to call 999 at the first hint of him kicking off.

OP - just pack his stuff that is packable. Let him take you to court over the sofa, etc.
Once he realise you mean it, he’ll back off. Court is a lot of effort and he won’t win anyway.
So he’ll end up backing off.

@MMmomDD

OP - just pack his stuff that is packable. Let him take you to court over the sofa, etc. Once he realise you mean it, he’ll back off. Court is a lot of effort and he won’t win anyway. So he’ll end up backing off.

This!

Ok I've still got a bit to pack. I'm doing all that's been advised 👍🏻I suspect he's going to try and drag it out but once it's outside it's not coming back in
I'm very hopeful that after tomorrow I can start to put the house the way I'd like it and feel more comfortable

@iamtheoneandonlyyy
How did it go? Hope you are Ok?

Spent days sorting it all. Got it outside and it was mostly my stepsons things.
I messaged to say it was ready and he said he would come at 1pm.
He never came. Then it rained and everything was soaked. I was messaging to ask when he was coming and I told him his sons stuff was getting ruined.
Long story short he was out on the piss and couldn't be bothered
I called his mum and she took some of it.
Now I'm left with a garden full of furniture that's effed and I've been told to tip it.
😡

Fuck sake.

Hes oh a wind up and still giving mood swings. Next day he was asking for another chance 🤨and when I ignored he got really nasty, all by text.
I've blocked him, he has no control over me now I won't allow it.
Not that it isn't affecting me, it is. Even this issue with his things was just more to hold over me.

Hes oh a wind up and still giving mood swings. Next day he was asking for another chance 🤨and when I ignored he got really nasty, all by text.
I've blocked him, he has no control over me now I won't allow it.
Not that it isn't affecting me, it is. Even this issue with his things was just more to hold over me.