Is he having some sort of midlife crisis?

[Teatime20]

Long time lurked and name changed for this as it is outing.

Bit of background, been with my partner 9years. We have 4 children, 3 are his. We've had our ups and downs but always managed to sort them out. When we first met OH was quiet but worked in a well paid job. Looked after himself in appearance etc. A few years in and he was going out drinking every day and doing drugs, I issued a ultimatum and that was the end of it. Around 3 years ago he injured his foot and was no longer able to work in the job he was previously doing. We decided that I would go back to work. However after having my daughter at 18 I didn't have much work experience so I enrolled in a course to get a qualification and work experience within a role and at the end, I got a job. We were both happy with him being the SAHP and myself working.

We moved from our flat into a house last year and ever since he's been acting strange. (Not in a he's having an affair way as due to his previous mental health and drink problem, he doesn't go out much anymore).

It started with him obsessing over his foot, constantly talking about it, doing strengthening exercises. Then onto healthy eating and obsessing over a doing a water fast (he done a 10 day one and nearly killed himself in the process).
He doesn't use deodorant or anything anymore.
He has now decided he is going to write a book about his new found wisdom on the subject of what food we as humans should and shouldn't eat and exercise and he is now obsessed with this and also telling everyone how to live. (His dad and aunt have health problems) he tells them to ignore what the drs have said and do listen to him as he knows what he's talking about.
He doesn't wear shoes out anymore as they are "bad for his feet" this leads to me and the children being embarrassed and not wanting to go out with him.
He has now decided he is going to change his entire appearance with long hair and bread (viking look as he calls it) and wear linen clothes.

I'm confused as to whether he is having a midlife crisis! I can't speak to him about it as he will talk over me until I just give up and agree as it's boring the life out of me.

I love him and don't really know what I want people to say just has anyone else been in this situation and did you manage to stay together or did they eventually get back to normal?

Sorry it is a really long post, I've been going round and round in my own head for a long time about this.

He was diagnosed with schizophrenia?

That's an extremely serious condition. How did that diagnosis come about?

Was he ever medicated and/or followed by a support team?

He's mentally ill. It's been diagnosed before. Speak to his GP.

Mental health crisis
Not being concerned about making you unhappy

Not normal at all, does he know it's pushed you too far , tell him you have booked counselling for yourself and you would like him to come along may make him realise how bad it is

What you describe is much more likely to be a resurgence of whatever mental health problems initially prompted his schizophrenia diagnosis. Not a "mid life crisis".

Diagnosed as schizophrenic as a teenager us a major thing!! Having paranoia about doctors should not be ignored!! Get help sharpish !

He was taking a lot of drugs and drink when he was younger and started hearing voices and seeing things that weren't there, he was really paranoid and took himself to hospital. They sectioned him and gave medication, he was on antipsychotic's for a couple of years and had a support worker. He was then put on antidepressants because the antipsychotic's were just making him tired and unable to do anything. And he's never had the voices or seeing things since then. I was with him when the gp said that he had been misdiagnosed and they said they thought it was a combination of the drugs and OCD, he was then signed off from the support worker, this was around 8 years ago.
Sorry there are a lot of questions I'm trying to answer.

Paranoia and delusions seem to be a thing he tends to experience. This isnt uncommon at all. They often come on during times of stress even for folk who dont have full on schizophrenia. His foot injury and having to change his lifestyle due to it, may have prompted him to be constantly stressed, which over time is leading him to become paranoid and delusional.

He needs a lot of care tbh. It's not going to get better until he sees a doctor and engages in treatment so that he can adjust to his new life in a healthy way and reduce his stress. If he won't get help at all, then you're stuck really.

Can you ask the gp for advice?

I will call the gp on wednesday as I'm currently working from home and unless he goes out he will overhear the conversation. I'm off on wednesday so can pop out to make the call.

I think you are right regarding the foot injury he gets very stressed if it's hurting more than usual. Thank you all for the advice and I will definitely give the gp a call and find out what happens next, but sure how it will work as he won't go to them

Some of this sounds like Mania - en.wikipedia.org/wiki/mania

I'm not a doctor, but have studied it in the past. It seems like he obsesses over a number of issues; some of which are ok like healthy food others not so like water fast, shoes etc.

In the work I was doing on a UK based dataset, it takes on average 10 years for a patient to be diagnosed with bi-polar disorder. This is mainly because patients tend to have a depressive episode/s first and then several years later have a mania episode. Coupled with not enough psychiatrists to actually diagnose this.

Additionally, a B12 vitamin deficiency can cause similar symptoms and if he isn't having multi-vitamins (from what you said, probably not as that's admitting you're on a poor diet! And multinational corporations playing on people's unhealthy eating habits).

Either way I would suggest calling the GP and she if they can do a home visit or they might be able to get the local mental health outreach team to visit.

I will see if its possible for a home visit as that way he wouldn't be able to get out of it. He does take b12 vitamins along with some other's as he is on a no grain, no dairy diet so uses vitamins to make up in what he's lacking. Will have a look at your link now.
And thank you to everyone that replied I honestly thought it was me going mad as everyone just thought it was amusing

It’s really important to understand that any diagnosis of a mental health condition is simply a catch-all term meaning you are exhibiting enough symptoms to meet the criteria. The real issue is what those symptoms are and how they affect you and those around you. What you have written in your initial post makes a lot more sense when you later talk about his earlier issues.

Try and objectively consider what you might be unwittingly masking or making allowances for, and also what the children might be making allowances for. This is in no way a criticism, because mental health issues are horrible and insidious, and caring families often find themselves accommodating tricky behaviours to keep the peace or protect the family member

He was diagnosed with schizophrenia when he was 18

Well. This.

This needs to be escalated to mental health professionals.

Will speak to gp on wednesday see if they can come out or arrange for someone from mental health team to come.

Good luck. Not easy xxxxx

Can't you go outside for a short walk and make a call in a park or somewhere else reasonably private and quiet? Wednesday's not far away so fine but in general you need to be able to make private calls without waiting for days for an opportunity to do so.

Unfortunately due to work I cant get out during the day and when I finish I have to sort the kids out