Am I being promoted because he fancies me

[Soggymacaroon]

I’ve been working at this place around a year now. I do a few roles and really specialise in 1 area of my job description. I was pulled into the bosses office . Who I admit, I have a massive crush on. I’m 30 and he’s around 50. Anyway I’m being promoted but the role isn’t something I’ve ever done and have no experience in. I will be working primarily with him and another person (who i would be managing). I might be reading too much into it but do you think this might be a way of spending more time alone together and he’s possibly attracted to me? I do feel like I have worked really hard and I’ve impressed him with what I’ve managed to achieve but it just seems like a strange move. What should I do, I do fancy him so I don’t mind but how should I play this?

I agree with Bluntness. It sounds as though you fancy him and are looking for signs he fancies you.

@RantyAnty the 1970's are calling you back

have some self respect op

I'm surprised at the replies.

If it's a job you've never done and have no experience in, are you confident you can do it or learn it fast? Because if he promotes you to a position you're incompetent in, you're going to rely on him to cover for you and should his good will evaporate, you're fired. And any of the staff who become aware are going to rip the piss out of you and know exactly that you're working your way up the ladder on your back.

Shagging the boss is a stupid move.

RantyAnty is bang on the money.

Take the job. Fuck your boss. YOLO

So you are not sure if he is married but you know there was someone. What about you? Do you have a partner?

Steel yourself op. Whatever the reason, if you want the job then take it, but don't be available to this man. It Might start well but it will not end that way. It will be awkward and you might find yourself without any job at all. You have power over him as long as you don't buckle. Stay as flirty as you are but do not jeopardise this opportunity nor the girl code by having an affair with this woman's partner.

To add, it slightly irks me to think women can't imagine they'd get a job on their own skills & merits - it's got to be for another reason. Believe the former op! You've worked hard and got a promotion- now don't fuck it up!

Thanks guys. You know what a crush is like you do look for reasons signs, I feel like a teenager. I think about how it could unfold and unfortunately I agree it would ruin my career or at least make it very awkward. I’ll take the job and try and keep myself in check. I suppose whilst there is ambiguity at least it’s helping me out. Why ruin that?

@PornStarHotChocolate
To add, it slightly irks me to think women can't imagine they'd get a job on their own skills & merits
Agreed - I wonder how many men in a reverse situation wouldn't automatically have thought they deserved the promotion because they were good at their job and they'd earned it?

It does sound like you are projecting your feelings into him.

Keep everything professional from the beginning. No personal questions, no contact outside of business hours, don’t get drunk on a night out, never delete messages. If you feel you need to delete the messages, you aren’t being professional.

I am sure you deserve the promotion, just don’t stuff it up by forgetting your professional boundaries. And before you know it, you will meet someone else to crush on.

OP you said you’ve worked really hard and impressed him. This is why you’re getting promoted.

OP I've been in a similar position before and it's absolutely possible.
You need to make sure you are the best qualified person for the job somehow, and see if you can quantify that.
Its not particularly great for your future colleagues, or for you if that's not the case. This applies anywhere where there could be some sort of favouritism - hiring family for example.

As someone who works in HR, I find this manner of promotion lacks transparency, but I've mostly worked for large organisations where you don't get offered promotions like this.

A job arises....why isn't advertised?

What's the recruitment procedure in this company?

Does your boss own the company?

Why isn't anyone else given the opportunity to apply for it?

What qualifications and experience are needed for the job and would you shortlist yourselfto the role if you were the hiring manager?

Is there a job description?

Whoever said why do women question being promoted......well if you're not qualified for the job and don't have the experience for it...then that's a good reason to question why you're being promoted.

Take the job. You will probably end up sleeping together, because the emotions will slowly cloud over the practicalities. But it probably won't work out, so try not to get too attached. That was my mistake.

Yes it happened to me as well, and I slept with my boss. Better yet, we fell deeply in love and moved in together. It was all over in under a year. Fast forward nearly two years later, and guess what, I still work for him! We managed it. Incredibly, the rest of our team have no idea. He told the CEO and Head of HR, who did nothing. He can't throw me out of the team, it's 2020 now and #MeToo is avoided at high profile companies like ours. As for me, I am doing my best work ever, sadly I still love him.

He would not put you in the role if you weren't capable, because he knows how it will look to others, and you have worked hard as you say. For me it was the same, he knew I could do the role but just happened to be attracted to me as well.