Rant Alert! Does anyone have any good tips on any of the following before my head explodes?

[LadySnotAlot]

We have money worries and my husbands overtime has just been cut.

My 16 month old daughter does nothing but scream all day.

My grandmother has decided to re-enter my life after 18 years in the most spectacular fashion by moving home from Australia into a house at the end of my garden.

I have to do a lot for said grandmother.

My Uncle has just been found in Spain living as a tramp (he's an alcoholic that went off the rails) He's now got alcohol induced psychosis and is mentally done for, can barely walk and can't talk properly. We're all being leaned on to get him back to the UK and no one has the funds to spend £8k on a medical helicopter to get him back here.

My marriage has been on dodgy ground for approx 6 months. Mostly due to money worries. I sometimes feel like walking but with two kids in tow it doesn't seem that easy.

I've been offered a full-time PR job but don't want to leave my LO's and childcare is disgustingly expensive for two. I've also been offered evening work at a retirement home so will probably take that.

Sorry everyone, but I just feel fit to either implode or explode or both simultaneously and really need a shoulder or four to cry on.

LadySnotAlot - how can it be if your husband does 72 hour weeks and you start working full-time that you cannot afford any help at all?

Have you thought about getting a nanny rather than using a nursery? It can be a lot more efficient to have someone in your home doing childcare and housework who is also there to pick up the pieces when children are ill etc?

but if you are earning a bit extra in the PR job, you can spend it on some home help, so you can spend some time with DH & the kids...

Because hubby says so...That sounds crazy I know! basically we have a mahhhusive mortgage and are struggling financially which means if I go back to work FT every penny counts and can't be used for things such as cleaner or ironing because it's needed elsewhere.

So your husband thinks it's OK to treat his wife as a skivvy in order to pay the mortgage???????????????

No wonder your marriage is in difficulties

I seriously think you need to consider all the unpaid caring and cleaning work you do and work out pretty damn fast how to reduce it/share it out a bit. You are totally overloaded with it.

HI - just checked back in. Was going to try to cure my mumsnet addiction by going cold turkey...
No, not with first huband anymore, but was my rational choice not to be. Money wise, it's just a long slog to get there. Sometimes me and dd had literally 90p for the weekend - beans and bread in morrissons. We did get there, and imo money stuff is a lot about self control, budgeting, and treating yourself sometimes. Not easy at all. It took me years. But, I do now have a lovely designer handbag that I promised myself about 10 years ago...

Take the PR job, it'll give you more confidence and a boost - and anyway a PR firm/job that is flexible on hours and working from home is like fairy gold dust from cloud 9, and must be seized for sheer rarity value. Worst case it doesn't work and you can then go back to powergen or whoever.

TELL DH how the housework will be organised. Give him responsibilities. If he says he can't then he has to find an alternative solution which doesn't mean you. Get uber organised so he sees you being busy and in control to avoid any whinging about not pulling weight.

Uncle - you can't do anything, put it in the too difficult box, close lid.

Grandmother - has she any support from social services? can you get some?

Crying kid - take job in PR. Journalists and clients make crying babies seem easy.

Thanks everyone. TBH I'm quite shocked that the general consensus, well, in fact the only consensus is take the PR job.

I kind of wanted to be around for the kids during the day but now I'm not so sure.

My twopence worth - take the PR job, if you find it too much - leave and get job in Powergen which will always be there. Sit down with husband and get him to realise that there is more to life than a big mortgage and that maybe its time to move to smaller more manageable mortgage. What would he rather - a happy wife and family in smaller home or big house with no wife and family cos the stress is tearing you apart. Unless, unless this is all part of a 5 year plan or something in which case get through it.

Does 16 month old always cry or is she teething at moment? If she always crys then childcare might actually help. If teething then won't be long before she's back to herself again.

In an ideal world you wouldn't work during the day, but right now life is not ideal, you need the cash. Your not going out to work full time on some whim, its to build a better future for your family. And working in a job you enjoy with flexible benefits is much preferable than working at night in any old job. all to easy for the night time, fitting in round your husband's work to turn into you both living separate lives - this wll not sort out your current problems.

And, yes, it is possible to get through terrible money worries etc and bad relationship and get to the other side and for the relationship to be better than it was before. I'm there at moment.

As for granny and uncle - do what you can and right now that doesn't sound like much. Be realistic with what you can and can't give and right now your barely able to give what you can to your own family never mind what is effectively your mother or father's family.

Peaks and troughs, peaks and troughs - just your in the trough and the moment but it won't be long before your back up in the peak and looking back at all this as though it was someone else.

And - GIVE YOURSELF A BREAK, SOUNDS LIKE YOUR A GREAT MUM, PUTTING YOUR FAMILY FIRST IN EVERYTHING, god your family are lucky to have you!!!