Pregnant and resentful

[Thekindyoufindinasecondhand]

I'm due to give birth in 8ish weeks and the past few days have been feeling really annoyed towards my husband, for reasons that aren't his fault....my body is obviously changing rapidly and his isnt for example.
He is a good partner, really excited about becoming and dad and supports me but I've started to also get myself worked up about will he pull his weight when baby comes (I think this has come from almost every friend I have complaining that their partner does not do enough!)
Is this probably hormones?! Did anyone else experience this. Just to be clear I havent actually expressed this to him, I do understand it's not his fault I feel like this at the moment!!

Oh, those pesky pregnancy hormones. So sorry. Many men don’t pull their weight after the baby is born. They probably can’t really understand the amount of change that happens to the woman. The exhaustion, the upheaval and all that goes in to bringing a little one in to a relationship. You have mentioned you haven’t spoken to him about what happens when you give birth. Please sit down and make it clear what is expected of him. Be as precise as possible. Make it clear you cannot raise a child, cook, clean, shop and maybe work without his help. Your husband will then know what is expected. You will have to keep reminding him and sometimes a power play can come in with the “I only have 2 hours sleep last night so I am the most tired”. I became really mad at my ex partner because he dared to go on a golfing weekend as if our 6 week baby would be fine with me for all 3 days. I didn’t speak up and slowly the resentment grew as his life barely changed but mine did. I should have spoken up. Babies change the dynamic of relationships but you must lay the law down as to what he is to do. You will end up nagging him if you don’t then worse still is when the woman gives up trying to get help from the partner and starts doing it all. That’s when a marriage can start to fail as the man feels he isn’t needed or wanted and connections get lost. So, speak up, get a commitment pre birth of what he is to do and enjoy your baby x

Does your partner pull his weight now? If yes then I'd say it's a good (not definite) indication but if not that's when it's time to worry.
If he's already considerate, which it sounds like he is there's no reason to assume he'll change.
However sometimes you do need to speak up. So if you're exhausted tell him he needs to look after the baby while you have a sleep. If you're both tired then you take it in turn to nap. If he works late 4 nights in a row you need to remind him you've been working all day without a break so would like him to support you.
I think communicating with each other is vital which can be hard in the early days but will help your relationship long term. Good luck and congratulations on your pregnancy.

I remember feeling like this with my first. I adored my partner and there were no issues at all, but towards the end of my pregnancy I started getting these kind of thoughts and even considered running away so I could raise my baby alone and not have to worry about him letting me down. It was very unsettling having these thoughts and they made no sense to my rational brain but I couldn't stop them.

I put them down to pregnancy hormones and they did go away as I got close to giving birth. He's turned out to be an amazing father and has more than pulled his weight.

If he normally pulls his weight, I would say odds are he will keep in doing so. But you could also have a chat with him about your expectations, to put your mind at ease and have an outlet for your worries.

Thanks everyone, this has made me feel better, was feeling guilty and a bit of a monster.
Yes he pulls his weight, he cooks every day for example. I often have to remind him to do chores such as, can you put the washing in when you have a second, but it's always done with no resistance, so it sounds like that's what I need to have a chat about is that he needs to be doing it without me asking perhaps.

He needs to take ownership, to have a regular 'thing', otherwise he'll forget. Agree with him that from now on xyz will be done by him to a certain standard. He'll probably forget at first but he'll get into the routine of it eventually.