Just need somewhere I can vent...

[lockdowngandt]

I've posted before about my DP(arents) and their alcohol addiction and how it has taken me a long time to realise how bad it is.

They are only early 50s and I would describe them as functioning alcoholics.
DBro who's early 20s has been taking the brunt of it as he's still living with them, when they drink he retreats to his bedroom and doesn't engage.
They both have jobs and seem to be doing fine with that aspect but my DF is self employed so I guess he can get away with it more.

They had a binge about 3-4 weeks ago where they went 4 days drunk. Dbro stopped talking to them and told my DF (who's the main drinker) that if this happens again he doesn't have a son anymore - I didn't know this until recently.
A few days ago I got a message from DBro with a picture of all the empty bottles in the brown bin saying they're on day 3...
DF also drove whilst drunk on day 1 literally 2 mins down the road to the shop for more alcohol - he wouldn't listen to DBro who tried stopping him and told him no one tells him what to do. He came back and knocked the bumper off his car reversing it into their house.

DBro has recently landed a new job which sounds great and is a good wage so it can hopefully help him move out once he starts getting regular wages - up until now he's been involved in working with my DF which has been neither here or there.
He told me he is giving himself 2 months to find a property to rent and has told me he will then cut off from my parents and won't even disclose his new address to them. He said my DF made his choice.

Whenever I visit them everything is above board and fine, they do know I'm coming as I live 45mins away so wouldn't just turn up unannounced and drag DCs all that way if they are not in.

I feel like the reality of the current situation hasn't hit me yet, I think there's an underlying aspect of a case of FOG for me (or at least the OG part) especially since when I see them everything is fine and dandy, my DM makes amazing food and bakes her own bread and has a beautiful garden and my DF is very handy and can pretty much do/fix anything and unless you knew them you'd never know there was this issue there.
My DGPs who live far away have told me to tell them that unless they go sober I won't visit with DCs anymore but it's impossible to know if they actually are as I usually only see them once every week or two when they make sure everything is fine.

At the mOment I feel a bit sick and have a sense of dread whenever I think about the current situation and I have no idea what to do with myself...

It sounds awful but tbh i think with you, your brother and your DGPs onside you can all present a united front and tell them - it's the drink or it's us.

In your shoes I'd be giving all my support to my brother.

Thanks @Brefugee up until recently my DGPs were unaware of the issue. It's all come out over the last few months and they've had lots of conversations and even just plainly told them off about it. But they are too far away, DBro actually tried dealing with it on his own for a long time before talking to me about it and he's just about done at this point.
Me personally I feel like not addressing it myself as 1) it's most likely to just bring on denial and anger and blame - they tend to shift their reason for drinking onto whatever the current issue is. My DF has said before "if you do xyz/sort insert issue here* then I will be able to stop." A part of me is concerned about the potential fall out and I think they will just hide it better.
2) if they accept they have a problem they will want me to sort any potential AA meetings, vent to me about stuff and I have enough on without that emotional weight.

It sounds like a cop out but a very selfish part of me wants to just stick to status quo and just see them every couple of weeks and not get involved.
Another part of me is making me feel guilty and like I should be jumping into the fray.

I would support your brother fully here.

The only people who can address your parents alcoholism are your parents themselves. All they hear from other people is white noise and they do not want to know. And what they want is for you and people like your brother and GPs to keep on enabling them.

I would also suggest you contact Al-anon by phone and at the very least read their literature. www.al-anonuk.org.uk/

I will be supporting my brother @AttilaTheMeerkat we are also trying to hopefully help him with practical stuff for when he moves out.
He doesn't know but I'm putting together a box of first aid stuff and general medicines for his new place as I know he won't have a clue - a few months ago when he had a cold and was feeling dreadful I offered him a lemsip and he didn't know what it was or how to use it
I'm also putting together a cleaning caddy with all the basics and cloths/sponges and so on and will be putting labels on for him so he knows what it's all for "bathroom" "sink" etc it sounds daft but I remember how clueless I was when I moved out.

We might be able to help him get some furniture together as we have a friend who owns a shop and would do mates rates or returns which have small imperfections and they usually can't sell on so will let go for peanuts.
And we will offer practical help if he needs it - DP has a largeish car so could move stuff for him if he wants.

I spoke to AI Anon but to be honest I just wanted someone to talk to but the lady cut me off and just wanted me to go to the meetings which isn't doable for me.

Good luck , OP, it sounds like an awful situation all round

He told me he is giving himself 2 months to find a property to rent and has told me he will then cut off from my parents and won't even disclose his new address to them

It seems a bit mean to use them for somewhere to live, then ditch them as soon as he had somewhere else.

If he dislikes them that much he shouldn't have used them, but should have moved out ages ago.

@NoMoreDickheads they were happy to have him, they have plenty of space and he's only in his early 20s so not exactly super late to move out.
Without being too outing he has been through some pretty horrific times over the past few years and didn't want to have much of a future - luckily his view has changed now.

Their alcohol issues also got progressively worse and he got entangled in working for my dad at a low point and hasn't been getting paid a proper wage. He is also in a large chunk of debt partially due to my parents - he's now looking to move out because he has managed to secure a job which will earn enough for him to be able to afford to live independently and pay off the debt.

He's hardly using them.

Coundn't he move out now and stay with you until he gets sorted.

@Janedoughnut if that was an option we would've done that months ago.

We don't have a spare bedroom or much space, he would've had to share our small lounge and the sofa with the dog...we also live a fair distance from his town and new place of work.