Why today?

[Bellelou]

I’m feeling a little sad today, but I don’t know why?
XH left 6 years ago after a long marriage and an 18month affair with OW.
Today would have been our 30th wedding anniversary and I feel sad but I don’t know why.
When he left I was devastated. But I’ve been through the grieving, the hating him, the divorce, the splitting of the assets, the dealing with the children’s grief. I’ve moved on, met a lovely new man, started a new life with him and I am genuinely happy. I’ve barely thought of my XH for a long time, but today it’s hit me like a brick! I just feel sad. Is that normal?

It's completely normal. Today would, in another life, have been a cause for joy and celebration, so even though you've moved on it's understandable to think of what might have been.

I can remember similar many years ago now.

We had been separated 18 years before we got divorced. Because I didn't care. I had no intention of marrying again, had sorted out the financial side and by then the kids were well over 18. He eventually instigated it because he wanted to get married again.

I was fine about the decree absolute - it was just a piece of paper. The following week I had to leave a wedding reception early because I was in bits. - Totally crackers but it is what happens.

I’d say it was completely normal. Was in same situation only a few weeks ago as would have been 30th anniversary too had exh not dumped me. But glad he did really as have moved on much happier with current partner & our DS but day still made me sad. I guess its just thinking what might have been xx

Thanks for replying.
I feel better again today. I think you’re right , it’s the what might have/should have been that upset me.
He left about 6 months before our silver wedding and two days after we’d been discussing what we should do to celebrate that!!
So I think I feel a little cheated out of the family Celebration it would have been.
I think I also feel a little cheated because he’s now married to OW and although I am really happy with my new partner, he doesn’t believe in marriage and I’ve had to come to terms with that not being my future. But that’s a whole other thread!!