I had a difficult time growing up: my home life was dysfunctional - my parents were depressed and had personality disorders. The house we lived in was a mess and my brother and I were mostly neglected, emotionally abused by our mother and I was physically abused by my father. Consequently I was left with no confidence and self esteem. I also felt very different to other children my own age. It really badly effected my academic performance at school and how I generally behaved & came across. I was also covered in eczema and looked terrible which didn’t help.
The 1 or 2 friendships I had at school were toxic and one of the girls was completely emotionally manipulative.
On top of everything, I developed a reputation for not ‘being nice’ by saying the wrong things or behaving a bit weirdly - this was due to a complete lack of social skills. Everyone tried to avoid me so I was isolated, I was also mocked behind my back (or sometimes directly to my face) and bullied. People (teachers and peers) also thought I was a bit thick.
Things changed for me after I left school. I ended up looking very attractive (according to other people), established a successful career, became
very well presented, developed social skills and got married to a lovely man. However I am not in touch with anyone I went to school with. When I have bumped into people I went to school with I have either been blanked, treated with hostility or laughed at (literally). On social media, no one from back then wants to have anything to do with me (even if I have reached out). It’s so depressing and I feel like a large section of my life is void 
.
What makes it a bit worse is that I made a group of friends outside of school and 10 years ago I had a fling with an ex-boyfriend of one of the girls in the group (she was 16-18 when she went out with him and we were in our late 20s when I had the fling). She obviously felt very betrayed (I didn’t mention it when I once met up with her - partly because it was literally just sex and also I knew she still had feelings for him even though she is married), however she convinced everyone that I am a bitch and they don’t want anything to do with me either. It’s just horrible knowing how hated I am by everyone and it’s really affecting my mental health.
I have moved to a different city since but feel like I carry this stigma around with me...
I know this is a personal story but has anyone been in a similar-ish situation where (swathes of) people have a negative opinion of you based on how you behaved and looked as a child/teenager.
Would be keen to hear your thoughts as it’s really getting me down - I was a vulnerable child when things started to go downhill and I’m now carrying this burden around with me. Thank you