Feeling small...

[angelofmum]

I added a guy I really like on Facebook late last night (seemed a good idea at the time🙈). He hasn't accepted the request yet and now I feel really rubbish and taking it as a sign he is ignoring me. The notification comes up instantly on my phone if someone adds me so not sure there's a reason he wouldn't of seen it. Unless he doesn't have the FB app and has to log in online.
How long should I give it before cancelling the request? I feel like such an idiot now. I've wanted to add him all of lockdown and it took courage to add him last night.
Please no nasty comments x

Some people don’t live their whole lives on Facebook. But it seems you might be the type to worry even if you do cancel the request. Like, what if he saw it..

You are overthinking it!

Leave the request and if he accepts you great, if he doesn’t, don’t take it personally. Stop counting down the hours too, I don’t see my friend requests for ages!

Okay thank you

Doesn't come up on my phone at all! It's been less than a day. You're over thinking. Can take me days to notice an add.

Sorry I know I sound OTT I just like him and I don't usually make the first move

I appreciate the reassurance

Also if he accepts your request this does not equal he feels the same
You do sound a little over invested from one friend request

Oh just leave the request. I have requests still pending that I sent years ago! Maybe he hardly uses Facebook or only has closest friends and family as Facebook friends. I don't get a notification on my phone when I get a friend request. I'd have to open up Facebook to see it. It'll look more odd if he has seen it and you retract it now.

Late last night, and you're already worried at 10am?! He could even have been asleep since you sent it OP, let alone all the other reasons someone may not be looking at their phone, even if he does have the FB app! You're massively overthinking this

Sorry it's been 15yrs since I was last single and just nervous that's all. Of course I realise him accepting it doesn't mean anything.

Oh bless you. I don't always see mine at night sometime I find them by accident and I've got an iPhone and fb app, this has happened with WhatsApp msgs also I don't see them until I go into the app, only over night this happens don't know why.

You've sent it now forget about it, just forget keep busy and try not to over think it. If he does accept it great and wait for him to make the next move. Or if you really want to say a causal hello etc then leave it. Don't do any running after that, if he likes you he'll follow it up but you must not obsess over it, I only say this as I've been in your shoes many times before and I have learnt that if you keep a distance and let them come to you it plays out much better otherwise you come over as too keen and they run a mile. Just my personal experience ☺️

Some people don't go on FB that much. Also, I often miss notifications from the night. Or he might not have them on. Lots of possibilities.

Thanks so much @user1478639495 for understanding. Absolutely will not obsess over it now, I get instant notifications on my phone when people add me so I wrongly assumed everyone does. Definitely not chasing after him either, as like you said if it's reciprocated then it won't be me making all the moves😊

Thank you @ErickBroch that's a good point! Will leave it now an hope for the best

Don't overthink it - he may or may not see it. I apparently missed a request from a cousin for over a year and it wasn't til her mum asked why I didn't like her the situation came out!

@BlueJava oh no that did make me laugh🙈Maybe it's a settings issue? Mine is set so I get notified when someone adds me as a friend. I know some people might not have that setting or be on FB that much though

I don't have notifications on for instagram, twitter, or facebook. Just messenger and whatsapp! Hope hee accepts soon

Depends on his notifications, I don’t have any set up on my FB, I don’t see anything until I log in. I’ve recently seen messages I was sent over a year ago (oops). Don’t read anything into it, enjoy your Friday, and here’s hoping he accepts it sometime over the weekend 😃

I only keep facebook for the sake of more elderly relatives that for some reason will only use that and nothing else to communicate. I have notifications turned off because I think FB is awful and only check it when I get a message.

I don't know OP, I get the nerves but don't think it seems that healthy. Adding someone on FB isn't 'making the first move'and I doubt he will see at is ypu making a move either so much as it's just a normal thing and people add anyone they've essentially met it seems like.

How did you come to like him so much, how do you know him that you like him this much? Surely you must have already had a method of communication in order to?

If not I'd just remind yourself, for your own sake, you don't know him well or know much about his private life. These are odd times too. People have a lot going on that I imagine a facebook request may barely register. Don't make yourself feel bad.