I don't think I'm in love with my partner anymore

[xkayleeyx]

Me and my OH have been together for 12 years and have 2 children 8 and 6. In July last year I split from him, then, in a moment of weakness, I took him back about 3 months ago. We agreed that we were going to take things slow and see where we went, but then coronavirus happened and we decided that he should isolate with me and the kids at my flat (his dad is high risk). Everything was going pretty well. He went back to work this week and has been away for the last 3 nights. He's sent me flowers and keeps telling me he's missed me, but I can't stop this horrible gut wrenching feeling in my stomach that I don't love him the same way. He's a genuinely lovely person, and he would literally do anything for me, but I'm just not happy. He's due home at 10pm tonight and I just don't know what to do. He's unaware that anything is wrong and I just don't want to break him again, but I can't love him the way he wants me to, and we worked so much better when we were split the first time. I'm so conflicted with what to do.

Hi OP - hmmm, your reference to being 'in love' makes me wonder whether you perhaps have unrealistic expectations about how excited and romantic you should be feeling about your partner and about your relationship 12 years and 2 children into it. Perhaps that's completely wrong but do you think that might be something worth considering? I think for most long-term couples the 'in love' feeling becomes something less thrilling but at the same time very rich, deep and strong - the love bit rather than the in love. And I think learning to take pleasure in the fact that you go through the daily grind of mundane tasks together but still find things to talk about and interests to share. Do you experience any of that with him?

I need advice badly. Iv been in a relationship with this amazing guy, got engaged, had a beautiful son last year, I already had a son from previous relationship he's 13 now. My partner has a 6yr old girl. It started about 2 years ago her behaviour is ridiculous, she doesn't do anything I tell her, she laughs in my face even while her dad's in the room, dinner time is a nightmare, she won't eat nothing useless it's what she wants, ( sorry but am not making 4 different meals) she eats what we all eat together, she will make herself that upset ever time I tell her off or when I tell her to eat her dinner, that she will make herself physically sick on her dinner plate. She constantly says I just want it to be me and daddy. What do I do. Is my relationship over? I can't rake this anymore, dad is so laid back that he's constantly ignoring the situation (sorry but is it not his job to tell her off when naughty and not me) or am I wrong. Please help!!!

@Axel2019 - you've inadvertently posted on someone else's thread. You need to start your own.

Aww sorry first time on

I can't help feeling it's slightly unrealistic too OP, you can't really expect to me madly in love with someone the whole marriage.
I'd die for someone responsible, helpful and just nice.
If you are looking for that crazy in love feeling you will just end up having one boyfriend after another nn stop which would be horrible for your children.
At this stage the relationship should have matured into something else longer lasting and more profound than the early days and nobody can really replace the father of your children.
Can you not go away on holiday together without the children or do something else together that you will both find exciting and fun before just giving up?

Op what was the reason for your first split last summer?

I think perhaps you need some space from him while you think things through. Is there anyway this could be done without alarming and upsetting the children, anywhere he could go?

Do you do anything fun together?

I would sit down and write up good and bad points about him.
I would also talk to him about how you feel. You can’t keep it inside, I think you’ll feel better having a heart to heart with him.
Wish you all the best