Is marriage really the answer?

[freddyboy7]

A little under a year ago my partner stated her discontent with our 15yr + realtionship. In almost very way, bar the cheating, it seems a midlife crisis, as per 'the script'. Love, but not in love...

She is discontented with life in general, and won't or can't talk about the future. But she tells me to marry her, and I want to, but do not feel loved by her. So I am torn apart by the confusion she creates in me. Can anyone help me understand what she is thinking?

For context, I think I'm reliable, trustworthy, caring, hardworking, maybe not super exciting. I know we should already be married but I can't change that.

In these circumstances I'd say no, marriage is definitely not the answer...a sticking plaster at best.

After 15 years, if she wants marriage then why haven’t you married already?

She wants your money legally, if she leaves you.

Wound t get married now if she’s thinking of leaving and unhappy no......

Why haven't you married up until now?

Marrying her would be a massive, massive mistake. Don't be foolish. Your relationship is clearly not good.

Any kids?

She doesn't love you, why on earth do you want to marry her?

If you get married you will be getting divorced pretty soon anyway.
Save yourself the hassle and expense.

Is she disconnected because you are not married after 15 years, she may think you simply don't feel strongly enough about her to marry her but you feel she is fine for now, until someone else comes along for you.

You write she cannot speak about the future, but have you tried speaking about life now and how you got to this point in your relationship? She may just feel at a tipping point of questioning how much more she wants to invest without security for her.

How about suggesting couples counselling?