How is Lavender someone doing ? Also, a couple of other posters I'm thinking of.

[SunshineCake]

This poster was living in an Arab country iirc and was trying to leave her useless partner. They had children. Last I read she had managed to get a house in the UK and he thought he could stay there while seeing the children . I'd love to know that she and the children are well away from him and okay.

Also, GettingBigger, how is she. And WavesandSmiles.

Funny how strangers stories stay with you..

You really shouldn't be asking. You could be anyone.

There has been plenty of threads like this over the years asking about fellow posters.

Many of us take time and post a lot to show support and I for one like to know how people are.

Don't even think about having a go at me because you feel what you feel.

They don't have to answer if they would rather not. They could momentarily name change. You are making it a huge drama when there isn't one.

I won't apologise for caring.

I think about a lady called coats (it was a longer name) who had found out her husband was cheating and she was getting her stuff all together. I was leaving my ex at the time and those posts helped me a lot.

I remember Coats as well. Hope everything worked out for her.

Was it LavenderHoney? I was thinking about her very recently. I was also going through a separation and remember being so thankful I didn't have the added geographical challenges and being a bit disappointed that she didn't settle near me as I wanted to hang out!

15:17Auridon4life
Bit of a stupid comment, we all could be anyone! Or do you think everyone automatically knows who Lavender is

I remember Coats, not sure about Lavender, not ringing a bell. I love to read updates from posters who LTB and are eventually much happier as a result. It gives courage to many women, hopefully.

Lavender wasn't her full name but I can't remember the full one.

I wonder how OP from Softzilla thread is going

I wonder about the woman who discovered her husband who was having an affair had got another woman pregnant, while she was also pregnant. He really was a little weasel, along with her in laws who didn’t seem great. I think her name had Tree or something in it. Every so often I think of her and how well she handled herself, what a great mother she was to her little boy, and wish her well.

I wonder how Jamaisjedors is. She has/had a husband who did the silent treatment ie not speaking to her if he didn't get what he wanted. I think a trigger was on the anniversary of her father's death when they went away for the weekend but he didn't speak to her. She was conflicted about leaving him at first.

Then when she did, he had a psychological breakdown.

I think @Auridon4life 's point is that, on some threads, posters have been advised to be cautious because their exes have been aware of their posts. There has been a concern in some cases that posters looking for updates may have been a violent ex looking for info on location or plans etc.

I think that if somebody shares when their life is in turmoil, then it is less emotional risk to post an update. So i dont think the OP is doing anything inapproriate.

Less emotional risk, but sometimes a physical and practical risk. It's lovely that the OP cares enough to ask but sometimes people need to be cautious too.

@Wauden she still has an ongoing thread on here. Her and her two boys have settled nicely into their house, waiting on a court judgment about access soon I think.

I think just as the OP was asking the original question, with good intent, so was the person who answered.

Feel free to check with MNHQ. I've been here nearly fifteen years. I'm no one's violent controlling ex.

Thanks.

Red stripe lassie.
Still think of her.

I think her safety would be paramount to anyone who cared about her. No insult to you OP but it's dangerous.

Lavender Honey as I recall.
I think of her often and her threads stayed with me more than any other. Her husband was relentless.
I hope she's OK.

I wonder how RainMinusBow is doing. She must have had her home birth by now and I really hope that she is deeply immersed in a love bubble with her baby girl and her son is smitten.

I think about some of these OPs often.

I am of the thinking though that not hearing from some of them again, is a good thing as they have been able to get on with their lives and don't need this space as much anymore. That is what I am hoping.

@Wolfiefan Red Stripe Lassie started posting again under a different name (Blackcurrent/ Blackberry something I think) - her story was recognisable and she admitted to being the same poster. She’d left her DH after he assaulted her and moved back to be near her family, then he followed her there and basically harassed her until she went back to him. Said he’d change etc, but went back to smoking weed. She had another baby.

I remember her story as my daughter is the same age as hers, so it stuck in the my mind

@EllieQ oh shit. Sounds worse than ever.
I’m so sorry to hear about your daughter too. It’s awful to watch anyone in a situation like that and not be able to do anything. I don’t know how I would cope if it was my daughter. Hope yours manages to get free. Life can turn round.

Years ago there was a poster to was a lawyer, barrister I think and working and heavily pregnant, she had several children and had just brought a big house and he husband was gaming or something and had an affair and want to work things out. She was going to buy him out. I often think of her -she sounded so strong and which either way she went I'd love to know she is ok and things have settled down. Her name was tree related Sycamore or something. If you read this -know I often thought to you and wished you positive thoughts.