Green eyed monster

[Smoothasababy]

I’m jealous of my friends, two in particular. I feel guilty and bad about it but I can’t help it. God what can I do about it?

For a bit of context, they’ve basically had it easier in certain ways and I get eaten up by jealousy. I have good friends and I’m a good person which is why I feel so guilty at being this jealous. Does anyone else feel this way?

Is it not so much jealous as wishing you also have what they have because you feel you also deserve it?

I have that this myself. I was moaning to my friend about it the other night how the lives of other's seem so much more easier than mine and I get pissed off seeing pictures of their tidy house, happy children doing fun activities, they're all always smiling. Me? I'm a single mother to a two year old, I've been isolating for over 2 months and I have litteraly been cooped up with my daughter apart from a couple of click and collects. My daughter is very clingy. I have lost a lot of weight from just running around after her, not getting time to eat properly and just not having a break. Having a bath myself is a military operation. Everywhere I look I see something that needs doing.

So when I see pictures of said family I do feel like you do.would I change things and have a partner though? Probably not.

Getting 'eaten up' by jealousy and envy is exhausting. Fleeting pangs are totally normal, but getting such intense feelings is quite harmful to you and your mental health. Everyone has aspects of their lives that they are unhappy about and it's easy to compare yourself to others in a negative way.

Are your friendships healthy and supportive or are these friends quick to point out their triumphs whilst putting you down? If it's the former then it might be a good idea to look at some counselling to help you learn to focus on the good things in your life and accept or change the things you're not overjoyed about. If it's the latter then dump the friends. You'll feel much better without having such negativity in your life.

Jealousy is such an unhealthy emotion, it serves no purpose other than to make you feel bad.

You don't kno what goes on behinds closed doors. They may not be having as easy a time as you think n

Please don’t ever think that what people put on social media is the truth. Quite often it’s the opposite. You are doing a great job raising your child in these awful circumstances. You will be ok and come out on top. I would stop looking at social media for now.

Thanks for the responses. I appreciate it.

I know it’s pointless. my marriage has broken down. I know jealousy is pointless but it’s how I feel. I have one friend who does nothing but moan when I see/talk to her and then posts on social day and night with all the various amazing projects she’s doing, home improvements etc. which she never mentions in person-just moans.

How do I change from being the go-to person for moaning & privileged Friends?

I don’t feel like this about everyone. Just these two. I wish I didn’t

I remember meeting a girl getting very friendly, wishing I could be more like her and guess what? She committed suicide. Never compare yourself but also as you get older the things that you were jealous about won't be there. I've got two friends who I've known for 30 yrs. We have all had our good and bad times and it's worked out for us and we are still friends. They did have better jobs than me etc and I wouldn't wish bad times on anyone but we all come from different places and will have our own problems to deal with.
Have you not had it easy?

I've not been jealous of a friend, maybe envious but not in a bad way.
If your world has come crashing down, build from the foundations up, look to see where you can improve your own life, new man, new job, hobbies something to put passion into.

Thanks! I don’t like feeling this way. I can’t give too many details at the risk of outing but I’ve had a tough time & it can be hard listening to friends moan when they don’t know how good they have it. I know I need to focus more on myself and not compare. I’m not proud of being jealous but I don’t want to feel ashamed of it either.

Some people will just use to moan at. Just give them the slow fade and find some new friends!

Thanks! I guess you're right.