“Moved things around” to see me - in lockdown???

[Brunomarsbars]

Trying to arrange to speak to my boyfriend on phone is like trying to get an audience with the pope. He lives alone, no kids

He told me the other day he couldn’t speak, then “he’d moved things around” and could fit me in in the evening. He’s not working, and hardly like he had dinner plans in lockdown!

I’m fully aware I’m clearly not a priority to him and will be addressing that but what could he be moving around in lockdown??

Don't contact him at all at the moment.
Don't ask for a chat with him.
Wait for him to come to you.
If he doesn't, then you know where you stand.
You do already, but don't go chasing him.
He sounds like a self-important git to me!

I had one of these too - I got rid a couple of weeks ago when the golf courses reopened and I fell even further down the list of priorities. I seemed to sit somewhere between him having a shit and picking his nose.

I seemed to sit somewhere between him having a shit and picking his nose

At least you had enough self respect to get rid!

His wife and kids?

I'm sorry but this made me laugh out loud

Another one here who thinks just leave him to make the next move. that will tell you everything you need to know.

also, just because i'm curious -

1. does his facebook status say he's in a relationship with you and
2. what was the last nice date you had with him (before lockdown obviously)

I’m fully aware I’m clearly not a priority to him and will be addressing that

And there is only one solution - bin him.
You are an option - not a priority to him.

That’s not a sustainable relationship.

You deserve better. Tap into your dignity to power you forward out of this and on to much better things.

Why don’t you ask him ? At the same time broach the subject of his elusiveness. Tell him you value honesty and integrity. I wouldn’t dump him before you’ve at least satisfied your own curiosity.

Don’t ask HIM anything - just ask yourself why YOU have tolerated many “self important twat” episodes and allowed yourself to be treated this way. He knows what he is doing - you are right it is a power struggle - one where he wins and you have to be subjugated.

What’s his relationship history?

Why don't you ask him? This, of course, is not an unreasonable suggestion on the face of it.

But my experience is that people rarely tell the truth. Op will have to sit through a bunch of half arsed excuses as to why he's busy, got a lot on his mind, or blah blah blah. And she'll be no further forward. Things will go on as they were with her wondering whether she should take him at face value/give him the benefit of the doubt or not. It'll only prolong the head fuck.

He's not going to tell her, "Because I don't care that much."

Or “I am repeatedly yanking your chain in a power struggle because I am a self important twat and I disrespect you.”

What his actions. Ignore his words.