Past toxic relationship

[123xo321]

Hi,
So I was in a very toxic, emotionally abusive relationship which ended in November last year. Since then I’ve had the police out twice because of threats.
I started talking to someone new, someone who has an amazing job, makes me so happy, wants to see me, wants to take me out once lockdown allows us, I’ve just bought a house on my own, wants to help me do everything. I can’t fault this man at all.
But something in my head makes me think I’m not good enough for him, I don’t deserve this happiness, I don’t deserve to feel like this. Whenever I smile, I feel guilty like I’ve done something wrong. I’ve cried myself to sleep a few nights because I just think I don’t deserve someone as good as him. and I’m worried that subconsciously I’m going to push him away.
Whenever I say something and he disagrees I automatically say sorry and apologise loads and he tells me I don’t need to but it’s just instinct to do that.
Is this normal? I’m currently lying in bed at 00.35 crying my eyes out writing this.

Ok firstly I am glad you are safe
I really do not think you are ready to get involved with this man - if you were, you would not be crying about it. Also I am really a bit concerned you haven’t met him and he is promising you all kinds of things. You need to be really careful.

A new man coming along and ‘saving you’ doesn’t feel right this is why you are internally finding it hard to manage it. You are not yet healed

Having this guy as a friend is fine. But you need to heal. Have you had any counselling? Spoken to anyone about the toxic relationship?

Also think like this - you have not met this man. You do not know how good he really is only what he has told you

I started talking to someone new, someone who has an amazing job, makes me so happy, wants to see me, wants to take me out once lockdown allows us, I’ve just bought a house on my own, wants to help me do everything. I can’t fault this man at all.

You have not met this man. You do not know him. Do not be so desperate for a relationship that you fail to see the red flags.

Why does someone you've never met want to help you do everything to your new home?

Be mindful that there are a great number of people who would be more interested in the house than you.

When something or someone seems too good to be true ................
They usually are.
Be wary.
Please.

Please do the freedom programme