I know this isn't a big problem compared to most but it's weighing on my mind tonight! DP suffers from social anxiety and is generally a very quiet person – even with his family who he does love, he has a distant relationship and they don’t really ‘chat’; I think that I’m the only person in his life he really speaks to and we still have the odd argument over communication.
The issue is that I'm very close to my family, and his relationship with them is non-existent, despite my begging him to make an effort – he’s never rude, and responds when they ask him questions, but will never ask questions of his own or start a conversation. This does make me sad as I’d love them to have an easy relationship, and my family wonder about our relationship as they never see the fun, charming side of him that I do.
I feel guilty complaining as he would never do anything intentionally unkind (unlike my own DDad who could be very rude to my DM’s parents) but it's difficult – I prefer visiting my family alone so I can relax and not worry about pulling him into the conversation. Tbh it does wind me up too as I struggle with social situations but don’t have the option of just being quiet (no-one ever describes a woman as the 'strong silent type'... )We've talked about this before but nothing has changed - I know the real issue is that he lacks confidence and not that he’s just not bothered.
Has anyone else had similar issues with their DP and did it get better? Or do I need to just get over it as he's wonderful in so many other ways? (Worth noting that we're both early 20s in our first serious relationship so any wisdom much appreciated!)