Does marriage counselling work?

[Diabetes123]

So left just over a week ago.

Husband wants to go through marriage counselling but I'm just not sure. I worried that there is too much to change and I said that to him and that at the minute my hearts just not in it. He is the type of man that likes to be in control and he's very impatient!

I've told him just to give me time.

Can it work if he's now aware of his behaviour or is it too late?

Any advice greatly appreciated.

I'm sure it works for some people. For me, it was nothing but a waste of money

It doesn’t work if he is abusive. Or if he just wants to blame everything on you. Or if you are really DONE.

If there is a history of abuse... nope, he will just let you hear what he thinks you want to hear and revert to his old ways when he feels you are back to normal.

Having said that, you can go to counselling to try to achieve parting in good terms if you have children (as you will need to stay in touch) but don’t allow him of the counselour to talk you into trying again if you are clear you want to leave.

Not all marriages need to salvaged, sometimes is healthier to leave.

He's not abusive or nasty in fact quite the opposite he is a very nice man who has been so supportive despite me leaving.

The thing is I do still care about him and part of me still things that I do love him but I'm not in love with him. No physical attraction and everything he does and says gets on my nerves!

I know that sound very contradicting but its very difficult to explain the way I feel.

That’s more tricky, if you were angry or upset, you can work in finding a solution. But if you have fallen out of love, I would say that is better to part in good terms before you start resenting each other to the point of nastiness.