Totally pissed off with my DH

[whydontkidscomewithauserguide]

So been together with my husband 20 years. He was a smoker when we met and then stepped about seven years ago. He’s recently started secretly smoking again which I confronted him about, and he denied then admitted. Said it’s only a temporary blip. But now he’s practically doing it at every opportunity when the kids are occupied. Comes into the house stinking like a bloody chimney. New house, newly decorated and he doesn’t give a shit because of his stupid selfish smoking. I’m worried about his health and frustrated that he doesn’t seem to give a shit. I know he’s a grown up but am I being unreasonable to be fucking livid with him?

house is irrelevant as he’s smoking outside and ultimately it’s his choice so a bit pointless being livid.

It is when he comes in stinking of cigarette smoke and leaving a trail of it behind him as he comes through the front door...

I would be annoyed, the smell sticks to fabrics so it will build up even if he isn’t doing it inside.

Completely with you on this one. Also, check any life insurance policies- if he's declared a non smoker and something happens to him the policy will be invalid regardless of if it's related to the smoking or not.

Yeah - we all say it's a blip.
I quit for 21 years!
I've now smoked again for 10 years!!!
Just socially, then just 2 a day in the evening, then an extra one at lunchtime, then you go on holiday and just escalates.
He needs to try and stop asap before it takes full hold again.
And it does stink.
Would he consider vaping? I can't get on with it but at least it doesn't smell like cigarette smoke!

I couldn't get worked up about this

You met and dated a smoker!

Grim.

I'd don't think most smokers appreciate how much they fucking stink.

I have sympathy op. I met my bf online and he stated he was a non-smoker. Turned out he vaped, but that soon went back to smoking. I really dislike the smell on him too.

He has been staying here since lockdown began and has been using nicotine chewing gum for almost 3 weeks now. Might not work for everyone but he says they have been great for him and he hasn't smoked since. Now all he smells of is mint! Obviously he needs to kick those too and he plans to gradually reduce the dosage but I really hopes he sticks to it as when he came into the house after a cigarette it was horrible. I think smokers go noseblind to it.

Also, the 'secret' smoking - my ex husband used to do it too and it angered me more that he thought I was so stupid to not smell it than the fact he was doing it in the first place!

Thanks everyone for the helpful responses, its a combination of a lot of things that really annoy me! The biggest fear though is the affect on his health. Thanks again I appreciate you taking the time to reply xx