AIBU about holiday?

[Zigmoda]

Hello, so I've just found out I'm pregnant, very early days. We had booked to go on a cruise for my husbands 40th on March 2021 but as baby will be due in January 2021, baby would be too young to take so we now can't go. The other option is we bring it forward to late Sept this year. I've said I don't want to go as I'm worried about the virus, more so now being pregnant. By then ill be around 5mths & pretty vulnerable. I know Sept is a fair distance away but it's still a risk. The cruise company may cancel anyway. But my husband is being really moody about it as he really wants to go. I almost feel like being pregnant is an inconvenience, although I maybe feeling irrational. Am I being unreasonable not wanting to go in Sept? We also have 2 young children & i don't want to put them at risk either....

YANBU

Why can't you go in March? Is there a minimum age limit for your cruise?

Your husband being moody must be really lovely for you With two children already, isn't he used to children being a slight inconvenience?!

Might be better to push it to April/May? If the cruise company will let you though it might be great in March, my favourite holiday post-baby was with my then 9wk old.

I am somewhat hopeful about holidays resuming in Sept/Oct (plesse god) but a cruise is a long shot for Summer 2020.

I doubt there will be any cruising in September.
What does your husband expect you to do? Leave an 8 week old baby and two other children to go on a boat?
Is he always that selfish and stupid?
I’d avoid talking about it or just say you’ll have to see what rules are in place at the time. Personally I think the chance of cruising anywhere in the next two years is nil. I hope you don’t lose your deposit.

A baby has to be 6mths old or more to travel on a cruise, which makes sense. It would be so worrying taking an 8wk old with no proper medical provision for such a young baby, plus they wouldn't have had their vaccinations by then. So the earlier we could go would be mid June next year but of course the prices hike massively then during school hols. Our little boy starts school that Sept so we couldn't go then either. I think he understands the reasons why I don't want to go this year, but I dont think he necessarily agrees. His parents were due to go with us but they have backed out of potentially going this Sept due to the virus. So if they're not going, it wouldn't be sensible for me to go either being pregnant, but I think he thinks I maybe over reacting.

I have another worry... telling my work. I only returned to work this March after having our daughter... and now I'll be going off again in December. I know I can't be discriminated against but behind closes doors management may... especially as a restructure is planned this year.

Quite a stressful start to this pregnancy!

Cruises are basically Petri dishes for this disease. The fact he is moody that you won’t put yourself and your family (HIS family!) at risk for it is really horrible. Being disappointed is one thing, being moody with you is something different.

Did he want another baby? I don't think he's reacting very well but it's probably disappointing for him not to be able to go on his birthday holiday.

I wouldn't go on a cruise with coronavirus about. Either this year or next. Find a different holiday

I am very rational, calm and realistic assessor of risk. E.g I'm not disinfecting my shopping or panicking about going to Tescos.

But there is no way I would be getting on cruise ship until we have a reliable vaccine for Covid, Your husband is a selfish moron.

Op, on telling your employer about the pregnancy, 25% of women are discriminated against regardless of the law. Because there is no legal aid any more, companies make you redundant against the rules and assume you can’t afford to take them to a tribunal.
The solution is to take out family legal insurance. It’s usually a tick box at the bottom of your house insurance and costs about £20. Take it out before you tell anyone. It covers you for employment discrimination & redundancy disputes.

My £18 insurance allowed me to fight and won me £68,000 in legal fees and compensation for lost earnings.

Good luck.