Hi so this is going to be a sensitive thread and if you’re triggered by this sort of stuff then don’t read it.
I was with my ex on and off for 6 months last year and thankfully in in a settled committed relationship with a lovely man who cares for me and I don’t need to deal with my ex and his shit anymore. This ex was charming and attentive at first and he fitted my physical type which is what attracted me to him. I met him online as we had mutual friends. There was warning signs from the start but I ignored them as I desperately wanted to be loved and settled down and at that time in my life I felt really behind. The warning signs were that he was really interested in sex and basically most of the time would ask about when we’re gonna have sex but I ignored them signs because of his charming and attentive side. He was (and probably still is) obsessed with his ex as she is to him. We got together and a month after we first had sex he became really distant and blew hot and cold. When he was drunk he talked about having a threesome with me and his ex. I said no. I would go weeks without seeing him and when I did we never went out on dates since he became distant it was either his house or out with friends. When we were out he would pay more attention to others and act like he couldn’t care less about me half the time. He would ask me over at 3am for sex when he was drunk but would’ve told me earlier that day he was too busy to see me. I’m stupid for letting him treat me like shit but when I would speak up he’d be a prick and be even more distant saying that it was because he couldn’t express his feelings. Well he broke up with me whilst drunk in July and I stupidly took him back in September. I should’ve walked away when I noticed the first warning signs and I was stupid for letting it go on for so long and taking him back but we all live and learn.
Well fast forward to late September my ex and I had just had sex. We were cuddling in his bed when my friend called me. I answered then he climbed on top of me and started having sex with me again. I quickly finished the conversation with my friend. He was laughing and I said what did you do that for and he said oh I thought it would be funny to let your friend hear you orgasm. When this happened I was very uncomfortable but laughed it off as I didn’t want him to yap then become distant again. Yet he did and I took the decision to break up with him that October.
I’m now with an amazing man who’s nothing like my ex and the way my boyfriend treats me is amazing. He’s the one but I could’ve been with him a year earlier and not have gone through that crap with my ex and other guys.
Did my ex force himself on me or am I just overreacting? To this day it still gets me. The only reason I haven’t really told people about it or reported him as I’m friendly with his sister and his family and I don’t want to put them through grief. Yet in angry with the way he treated me especially now as if I would’ve just got with my current boyfriend that year we could’ve been living together. My ex really crushed my confidence in myself last year made me feel worthless and I even had suicidal thoughts over him.
What do you think?