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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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8 replies

Foxy456 · 02/05/2020 19:17

I met my bf whilst he was still in a relationship, long story short his ex was also seeing someone new and had been seeing him before me and my bf started anything. She took a year to leave the home they shared as they have a child and she said she needed to save etc. She continued seeing the guy and me and my bf continued seeing each other. She moved out 7 months ago lied to his family who sided with her saying she wasn’t seeing anyone, so they then took the pity approach. (Even tho there was proof in form of cards etc from guy). My bfs family are disgusting towards me, we hv been made out the bad guys whilst his mother continues to feel sorry for his ex ( even tho she is now with said guy) His family point blank ignore me infront of his child causing an atmosphere, his sister has called me a homewrecker even tho she didn’t know the full story. We live 50 miles apart see each other twice a week, atm I am at a low point and because he doesn’t understand or take any accountability for any part in how I feel he tells me to ‘get a hobby’ or ‘ stop being a knob’ everytime I try to voice my opinions or views I am made to feel I’m not allowed. He gets angry puts the phone down on me then will ignore me for hours. There’s lots of things that have happened in the last 2 years that have been disrespectful to me ie.. He has still continued playing happy families with her at times. It’s been 2 years 4 months and I feel like the way he is treating me is getting worse I feel like he doesn’t care or respect my feelings.

OP posts:
MikeUniformMike · 02/05/2020 19:59

I'd move on.

longtimecomin · 02/05/2020 20:51

Get out now, he's abusive and it will only get worse

BackseatCookers · 02/05/2020 21:10

I am at a low point and because he doesn’t understand or take any accountability for any part in how I feel he tells me to ‘get a hobby’ or ‘ stop being a knob’ everytime I try to voice my opinions or views I am made to feel I’m not allowed.

Anything re how you got together is a red herring.

The fact is you're with a man who doesn't respect you enough to listen to your feelings, doesn't love you enough to want to make you feel better and doesn't have the emotional intelligence to empathise.

Why the fuck would you be making the effort to keep this relationship going?!

End this and my god do not look backwards!

NoMoreDickheads · 02/05/2020 22:14

stop being a knob

That isn't an ok way for a supposed boyfriend to speak to you. That alone is enough to end it over, let alone the other stuff. xxx

rvby · 02/05/2020 22:20

?? This isn't a relationship. He just likes to have a punching bag. End it and block him, and get yourself some therapy or good self help books to change your mindset towards yourself.

Thisonemaybe · 02/05/2020 22:38

Leave

silverbirches · 03/05/2020 22:13

Of course your bf's mother is still in contact with his ex. There is a grandchild to consider.

Cut your losses from this so-called relationship, it is going nowhere.

category12 · 03/05/2020 23:09

He doesn't treat you well and it's getting worse, so do your future self a favour and dump the guy. Short term pain for long term happiness.

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