Can't believe im writing this.

[Broken55]

Husband has walked out and left me and the kids during lockdown. Im completely broken. Ive spoken to family and friends and nothing helps. I keep obsessively thinking about it all and crying. I have no idea how I am going to get through this.
Does anyone have any tips for helping it hurt less?

Didn’t want to read and run. I just want to say that you WILL get through this, and of course it’s really hurting. Is there any way you can pay for counselling sessions at the moment? I’m having some over FaceTime for other reasons and they’re so helpful. Make sure you take care of yourself as well as the kids. Run a bath, make a hot chocolate, read a book light a candle watch an uplifting film. It’s all so raw and it’s going to feel so painful and surreal at the moment. It might not even feel real. I know it’s so hard at the moment but I promise it will get better. I find reading poetry helps too I ordered Rupi Kaur’s books online a while back and they’re very relatable poems. I hope you’re okay and remember you’re not alone, you have lots of support around you ❤️

Can always PM me if you need, although I’ve not been through it xx

Another one saying yes, you'll get through this. Just take an hour at a time - whatever it takes to get through the day. Only someone supremely selfish could do that to their family at this time. As said already, eat little and often, watch a film and have a nice bath once the kids are settled. Above all, be kind to yourself and talk to people/post here. You'll get a lot of support on here especially when it's hard to be close to friends and family. For you

Sorry you are going through this. Do you know why he's left?

When my exh left I kind of went into autopilot and focussed on making sure the kids were ok. It was also a couple of days after Christmas so a strange time anyway and I was poorly with a virus (great timing) so much of the first few days is a bit of a blur (I also managed to knock myself out to add to the mix).

What did help me when it all sunk in a bit was friends. I know it's difficult not being able to see anyone at the moment and you say it hasn't helped but keep talking. I must have bored my friends senseless in those first few weeks but they never showed it and just vocalising how I was feeling really did gradually help.

I also referred myself for counselling and that also helped as I could talk to someone impartial, who didn't have a vested interest or 'sides'. It was through the NHS (IAPT) so perhaps look into that?

If there is no way back for your relationship then you will need to start thinking about practical things like child access, financial arrangements, etc. That kind of thing kept my mind busy but I am a very practical person and like to be 'doing' things.

I'm so sorry to read this OP. Sending hugs

I'm sorry to hear this.

Have you got immediate family/friends support?

I

None of us know OP - we just do it.
Hour by hour at first.
It's truly horrendous and there is nothing we can say right now that will make this any better. We can't help ease your hurt.
We can tell you that it does get better and that the pain does ease but not for a long time yet!

Concentrate on your DC.
Talk to family and friends and get their support.
It's gonna be even harder right now but you will do it.
We promise you will.
Don't expect miracles and to feel anything like normal for ages yet OP.
Be kind to yourself!!!!

So sorry op. Did he say why he was leaving ? Just take it a day or hour at a time be kind to yourself

Hi OP,

Been through this twice now.
Please be kind to yourself, and make sure you talk to those around you.
It's a truly shit situation to be in and will be a hard path to walk for some time and you will have up and down days, where you will find yourself moving forwards then back again.
Please don't try to push yourself too quickly and be forced by others to move too quickly, if you need to cry, rant etc let it out.
Sending you , if you want to PM me, feel free

So sorry OP , you must be in shock. Do whatever you need to do to get through the next couple of days. It's good that you've told family and friends. You will cope and get through this.

You will get through this. Where has he gone? Don’t let him back in. You don’t know who he’s been around. A friend of mine went through this and he brought the Coronavirus into the house when he came back and her and the kids got sick! If he’s gone, he stays gone.

I'm going through the exact same thing, my husband left me a week ago...if you want you can always pm me 😊

Oh OP, how awful. Hopefully you have someone in real life who can support you right now? Don't let him back in... xxx

Thank you everyone. Im going to re read and reply properly tomorrow as im burnt out today. Thank you so much xx

OP I honestly have no words to make you feel better, but I want to say I am sorry. This must be awful for you. Sending virtual hugs

Keep posting here if it helps OP. There’s usually someone around.

I'm so sorry. It's obviously come as a terrible shock for you.

It's better he's gone, though - you could have been stuck with him in lockdown, with him saying he's going to leave straight after. He's clearly got somewhere to go to, so I'd take advantage of him not being there and not having arguments.

You don't know how strong you are until being strong is your only option.

Hugs to you x