Rarely having sex

[Mummypig2020]

Hi,

Me and Dh have been married a year. We have been together 6. Have a dc together and 2 from previous marriage.

Dh suffers with low mood/depression.

This has caused his sex drive (which wasn’t great In the first place!) to drop to practically once every 6 weeks.

He barely touches me, doesn’t like me touching his body etc.

I don’t know what more I can do. He won’t get help. I’m at breaking point. My confidence is literally zero because he doesn’t come near me.

He isn’t cheating or gay. It’s clear it’s his low mood.

If you know it’s his low mood then you know it’s not you and it shouldn’t be hitting your confidence. There’s a fair few married couples that probably only do it once every month/couple of months so it’s not unusual. I think though the main thing to consider is what is the root of his depression and what can be done to help that. Do you have an inkling at what lies at the root of the depression? Have you talked about the depression (not in the context of intimacy)?

He does need help. Please encourage him to visit GP, NOT for the sex drive (I suspect that is a symptom) but for the low mood.

He could be depressed, in which case anti depressants may help.

Or he may have low testosterone (it drops in men post 30) too low can lead to depression lethargy etc. Again easy for GP to test for and treat.

I’m no doctor so probably many others.

Assumes you're correct and it’s the low mood that is the cause - fix the cause not the symptom.

Good luck to you both