Today I really need help. I got into an argument with my husband and it resulted in me having a bloody nose.
I don't know exactly how it happened but we were arguing and I lifted my hand up and he pushed my arm and my hand smashed into my face with enough force to make my nose bleed immediately. My nose is still sore several hours later. I took pictures of this but I'm too ashamed to send it to my mother or to my friend.
My husband said it was an accident.
He said he thought I was going to smack him and so he pushed my hand. I told him that I was going to call the police and he said that he will just blackmail me about things I have done in the past.
Because my nose started bleeding I punched him in the back; however, I'm not very strong and what good would it do.
Hmmm... I don't know what to think or how to feel.
So how did this argument start?
Yesterday my sister in law came into our house unannounced and started complaining to me about our 5 year old daughter and her behavior. Things haven't always been positive with my in-laws and sometimes things have been downright ugly. This was very hard for me and upset me. I tried to talk to my husband about this and it just resulted in an argument.
I have been dealing with a lot of other things in my life as well:
- I have issues at work
- we are in full lock down due to COVID and have to work at home. Sometimes it's really stressful working remotely as I can't see what my colleagues are doing. There is also a very incompetent colleague that I work with and it frustrates me as he doesn't retain information. It's causing issues on the project that I'm working on.
- my kids are both home from school and are completely bored out of their minds and are acting out more yet I'm expected to work at home
- this year I found out that my deadbeat father kept me a secret from his family for 30+ years; it's been really emotional for me and I'm dealing with that
- I live very far away from anyone close to me and I'm isolated
So after a long and stressful day working at home my sister in law comes into my house and starts complaining about my daughter and criticizing.She's 5!!! She's bored out of her mind because she's not in school and she's confused. This lockdown where I live is really hard on kids. I simply cannot cope with my inlaws being so intrusive and unreasonable.My inlaws are not even supposed to come around due to COVID but they do anyways.
When I talked to my husband about it he immediately says things like:
- it's my fault that my daughter acts like that
- he wants to lash out at me for complaining about his disabled sister (what's her disability got to do with this issue?)
- he doesn't care that I can't cope with his sisters; he says I'm just too sensitive
- he accepts that his family interferes with our lives and is OK with it but I'm not
- his opinion about what is going on is more important than my feelings
- he has more consideration for his family than he does for me
I've already tried to get him to go to marriage counseling in the past but he won't go because he doesn't want to get a babysitter for the kids.
I'm the breadwinner of the family.I have nowhere to go or to stay. I also don't know how to drive.