Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Worried about privacy sexting .

27 replies

neversurer · 19/04/2020 15:10

I love to sext but how can one trust the other when it's a new match up. Any tips or experienced advice appreciated please.

OP posts:
neversurer · 19/04/2020 15:27

Shameless bump?

OP posts:
pog100 · 19/04/2020 15:38

Well you can't, can you? Which means I would either avoid it or do it in a way that couldn't be used against you later i.e. Anonymously. I'm not sure if the laws against revenge porn extend to the written word but you are always going to be vulnerable in some way, but then so is he/she.

Sparklingplasters · 19/04/2020 15:41

Just assume that any image/video/video call will make it to Pornhub, then if you still aroused then crack on

Windmillwhirl · 19/04/2020 15:41

Dont send anything that you would be ashamed to be shown to others. Of course you cant trust some random you dont know that met on the inernet to exchange sex talk with. C'mon surely you already know this?

AvoidingRealHumans · 19/04/2020 15:42

If you mean written text then I suppose you can't make it anonymous as they could screenshot the messages and it would show your number/name.

I did assume you meant pictures at 1st though and I would think as long as they don't have your face in and no identifying tattoos or backdrops then they could be anonymous if they get used maliciously.

Trust is just a feeling and it can be wrong, especially when caught up in lust.
I wouldn't send anything explicit that I could be identified by to anyone at all

neversurer · 19/04/2020 15:48

Thanks. Only messages. I changed my photo to a landscape one so I couldn't be identified.
There isn't a big reason why I feel that the messages would be shared as I text very very little. It is the man who does the most texting.
I guess I have trust issues in general so worry a little even though they are not very explicit.Do some men even share these with their mates ?

OP posts:
Ilovethekittehs · 19/04/2020 15:50

Hey, you put a condom over your phone. Go gettum girl

itaintthatdeeep · 19/04/2020 15:51

Well you don't know who will get to his phone.
Or like my ex all his previous deleted files were reactivate for the police to look at messages.
I think they would of also seen all the sexts too.

BackseatCookers · 19/04/2020 15:52

Do some men even share these with their mates ?

Yes and so do some women. It worries me you want to sext strangers but seen so, so naive about this!

But if they're not very explicit then why are you so worried? They must be stuff you'd be embarrassed about getting into the public domain in which case you can go ahead (obviously, your choice) but know anything you send to a stranger or someone you don't know well can always be sent on to other people. Especially when they're all bored and horny under lockdown!

neversurer · 19/04/2020 15:55

I guess I am new to this and was wondering if there was a way of protecting myself . Thanks

OP posts:
midnightstar66 · 19/04/2020 15:58

Sorry but I got put off when the father of my children threatened to put our personal messages and pictures on the school Facebook page for all to see so I'd never trust a stranger, ever! Save that stuff for RL

Oscarthegrouch47 · 19/04/2020 16:00

I'm not sure sharing someone's sexts would be as interesting or pack the same punch as pictures or videos. But if you're worried then do it anonymously. I'm sure there are plenty of anonymous chat sites for this sort of thing.

neversurer · 19/04/2020 16:00

Gosh that's terrible! I am a little paranoid. I've changed picture and name so I expect I cannot do much more to protect myself so I think I'll just give up.

OP posts:
BlackandWhiteCat01 · 19/04/2020 16:02

If you’re having to change your name and hide yourself then you probably shouldn’t be doing it at all.
I think you’re safer finding other ways of fun tbh

Oscarthegrouch47 · 19/04/2020 16:09

@neversurer who is it that you're sexting?

neversurer · 19/04/2020 16:10

A man that I met on tinder.

OP posts:
Treacletoots · 19/04/2020 16:15

Check out the Instagram account Tinder Nightmares. Then think again if you want to.

Oscarthegrouch47 · 19/04/2020 16:17

@neversurer does he know your full name? Where you work? Any other personal details? If you are into thing sort of thing but worried about the possibility of it being shared then you need to go down the anonymous route. Use chat sites where you can't be identified.

neversurer · 19/04/2020 16:20

Thanks. He only knows my first name, the city I live in and my job.That's all.
I feel almost scared now Confused

OP posts:
neversurer · 19/04/2020 16:24

The only feeling I get from him on instinct is that he is a lovely easy going guy. He wasn't at all pushy or inappropriate. It just happened and wasn't extreme or anything as such .

OP posts:
NiceLegsShameAboutTheFace · 19/04/2020 16:32

Do some men even share these with their mates?

Doubtless some of them do. I've done this once before and I can definitely be identified from the pics. Do I trust the guy? Well, yeah, I do but, despite us being friends for a decent length of time, I can't honestly say that I know him that well. He was more careful with the pictures he sent to me. Read into that what you will .....

A good friend gave me some advice. She simply said to me: how would you feel if Mr X emailed your pictures to all@my_workplace.co.uk? He knows where I work and could easily do that. She wasn't being in any way 'preachy': just getting me to think ahead. The pictures are good: completely revealing but not distasteful. I had a think, decided I could live with it and shared them.

They haven't appeared on our website. Yet ....

Intothefuture · 19/04/2020 16:37

You can’t possibly trust him. You don’t know him and you probably haven’t even met.

neversurer · 19/04/2020 16:37

That's good advice thanks. Only messages in my case. He doesn't have my phone number or second name and I won't send pics. Perhaps I'm frightening my own self .

OP posts:
BackseatCookers · 19/04/2020 16:44

If you're nervous about it then don't do it. I think this is one of those situations where regretting not doing something may actually be better than regretting doing it!

To be be honest you sound naive and I'd be worried that someone could push your boundaries easily or persuade you to share more than you originally wanted to, which leaves you open to things going wrong or you having anxiety if things go further than you planned.

neversurer · 19/04/2020 16:48

Thanks for your advice. I will
Take it on board .

OP posts:
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.