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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Please help me not reply! Please!

31 replies

IamNOTreplying · 03/04/2020 16:22

Ok, so I started talking to a guy on a dating website about a week ago. We hit it off really well, absolutely loads in common etc. We exchanged, numbers and were texting constantly. Made plans to go on a date when all this is over and that was brought up several times in conversation. Probably due to isolation boredom we started sexting last night Blush I’ll be honest and say it was pretty much initiated by me, in no way was I railroaded into this.
Surprise surprise he’s gone cold today Hmm. It’s really difficult to explain because it’s not like he hasn’t been in contact. He sent me a good morning text before he started work this morning and has text throughout the day but they just don’t seem as interested as before. Less x’s on the end than normal, way longer between reply’s than before and I’m just getting a general ‘I can’t be bothered feeling from them’.
I’ll be honest it kind off stings that somebody who seemed so genuinely interested turned out to be after one thing but I’ll get over it. It’s only been a week, on to the next and the rest but I don’t want to reply to his last message. I can foresee me being ghosted and I really don’t want that. If it’s going to happen I’d rather be the one doing the ghosting. So please! Stop me from replying to him!

OP posts:
Sugartitss · 04/04/2020 14:35

you sent pictures!

you gave up the goodies and now he’s gone.

LuluJakey1 · 04/04/2020 14:39

Just don't do this. It's pathetically needy and will only attract awful men. Have 6 months to yourself and focus on building a life where you look after you and build your self-esteem. Be happy without a man for 6 months.

VeganCow · 04/04/2020 18:36

Why would you send pictures to a man you've never met, why would you send them even if you had met him, don't get that at all.

ChristmasFluff · 04/04/2020 19:35

Erm, send pictures if you want (obvs don't show your face), but why on earth are you so invested after a week?

A stranger has cooled their communication. So what?

Seeking advice at such an early stage of a non-relationship suggests you are getting inappropriately invested. Natalie Lue has a great book that you might find applicable - 'The Dreamer and the Fantasy Relationship'.

Mermaidwaves · 04/04/2020 19:44

All men online say they haven't had many dates, they don't have much luck, it's textbook. The majority will engage in sexting without any intention of taking it further or any real interest on their part. Just move on OP, because he's probably talking to lots of other girls too. It does suck when you find someone you connect with but this happens all the time.

GotTheCityOnLockdown · 04/04/2020 19:48

How old are you both? Does his job involve driving? Does he have kids? These are all reasons why he may not be replying as quickly/in depth as before.

If it was a pattern of him being very blunt/odd for a week on the trot then I'd agree, but it's only been today. Relax a bit.

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