Any happy/positive love stories from previously single women who have kids?

[Poppygirl96]

I have a 4 month old son and have recently split from his dad. I’m not looking to date any time soon (at least 2 years as I want to focus on myself and wouldn’t expect to anyway with this virus happening).

But just worried that one day no one will be interested in me as I have a child and usually men run away as soon as they find out. Again not really looking to date any time soon and of course my son will always be my main priority.

My aunt has been single for 5 years since she left my uncle because she has a child and hasn’t found anyone interested in settling down with her.

Just wanted to know if any one had amy positive stories about meeting someone again/finding love again after they already have a child.

Off the top of my head - an ex if mine's friend's ex wife (the friend cheated on her, quite a lot) who had four (I think) kids with him... met and was engaged to another - much hotter than her ex - guy when I last saw them. I particularly noted it because he was hot ☺️.

I don't know if he had kids of his own .. many men do after a certain age, so they're in similar circumstances.

My aunt who had two kids had various relationships in her 30s (and maybe 40s( I'm not totally sure, but later met and remarried her fantastic husband. He'd been cheated on by his wife and divorced her.

They're really well suited and happy, he's a builder who built their home, an annexe home for her son and his family etc., who took my late disabled uncles out with my aunt to various things like concerts (they were very shy and not "out" much but they trusted him totally and were happy as long as he was there) ... They had a big proper lovely white wedding when they got married.

An ex colleague of mine who was divorced with a son was in a long-term relationship with a (younger, attractive, professional) guy .. I left the workplace so I don't know if they're still together or got married etc. The latter seems likely as they seemed very committed/established etc. I think she just didn't want to destabilise her son by getting remarried of living together til he was older.

I can think of others but it would take all day. I don't think you aunt's experience is totally typical.

Many single men over a certain age have kids themselves. Some of them might be hypocritical but others will actually want a parent as a partner who understands some of implications of being a parent.

A d some single men are willing to get into serious relationship with women with a child/ten. One CHD in particular is not as daunting as several.

But even in the "worst" case scenario, why not concentrate on yourself and your child til they're a teenager/young adult and then concentrate on meeting someone. My aunt and a friend of mine didn't meet someone for a relationship until "older".

Yes. I had 3 when I met my now husband x

Me! ExH left when DDs were 2 and 4. I put my profile on match a year later and met the loveliest man. We’ve been together 5 years. He has DCs from a previous marriage.
Good idea to focus on yourself for a while but it’s definitely possible. Good luck!

My ex DH left at the beginning of last year. We have two fairly young school age children. He had an affair, blamed me the works. Obviously I ended up with both the kids 6 days out of 7. I thought I'd never meet anyone.

Met someone in my local pub who is quite a bit younger who doesn't have any kids himself. He is more attractive than my ex. It was meant to be a bit of casual fun but we clicked and we've been together for 6 months. He has recently met my children and they adore him.

Focus on yourself. A decent guy will take you and your child as part of the package.

Following!

Ex left for ow. 2 primary age kids with me 12/14days. I do have decent family childcare which allowed me to go out but usually did OLD on my free weekends. About 2 years after ex left I met a lovely solvent, sensible guy with a son. We are 3 years into a serious relationship but we don't live together and have no plans to until the children are grown.

God these stories are good to read.

Please don’t worry. I had four children and was never short of offers. I don’t rush into relationships, I made each one wait 3 months before getting intimate.
Respect yourself, be confident and the rest will follow.

Me! I never expected it as was focused on DC and work but met a lovely man three years after horrendous split and court case when I wasn’t sure I would ever trust anyone again. We now have a house together with a big chaotic blended family with children coming and going and we both feel really lucky and determined to make the most of it.

It is a bit harder, but you’ll still find someone for you when you’re ready.

Me and my boyfriend have been together eleven months (so still early and could go tits up), but it hasn’t been an issue that I’m a parent despite very few people in my community having children. They’re even surviving lockdown together!

Bumping and following!

Yep, positive story here too. Had a fun long term relationship after splitting, and then after dumping him, met my lovely DH. He also had children, and although it was tough at times, we are very very happy.

Also bumping and following. I've been single forever so nice to hear it can happen!

Horrendous ex, dreadful split, two small children, met him two years ago at a gig, he is now happily snoring alongside me, helping to home school both through lock down.

Precious to him 2 kids and the wrong side of 40, never short of offers and as poster said up thread, was just really careful with whom I got involved.

Plenty of hope, enjoy getting your life back xxx

I left an abusive relationship when I was three months pregnant. I luckily haven’t seen my ex since. When DD was 5 I met my perfect partner who I’m now married to. He adopted DD when she asked if she could call him dad and we’ve had another two children together since. He is an amazing dad and has always been the same with all 3 kids. It can happen.

Great to hear these stories. I have two toddlers from an abusive relationship and often wonder if anyone will be interested in me long term. I have them 100% time so little or no free time ever.

Yes you will find someone giving yourself time and just because you are a parent does not mean you are not undesirable to men.
Many men like stability of a parent and your time is limited but that can be helpful to balance out your life and family.
Your aunt is not you or your personality.
I disagree to wait for the child to be of any certain age..
do not forget the child has to accept it as well as the adults, not all teens like mum dating!
I suggest taking it as it comes with meeting a man, you know what you want and need when it happens.
My love of my life happened when I had a two yr old, we all got along and he was fun to have around and accepted my child as part of me.

As we get older many of us have children and a past.
Ps.. if you are not dating make sure you have girls nights out, even if once a month, keep up the social life somehow.