Doesn't love me won't decide

[Wom34]

Dh declared he didn't love me "as he should" last year- then came therapy and it seemed all sorted. In February he starts again- (bought me new engagement ring for Xmas too) back to therapy ... he just needs "passion" and after 17 years and 2 beautiful kids he can't find it. I worked as high power city exec until starting my own company 4 years ago ... now pandemic - world shut down and I'm stuck here with this- and no work- financially dependent for first time in my life. Every morning I wake up fine until I remember I am not loved... arghhh. I'll be damned if I get pushed out of my life but he won't / can't decide what to do - like a helpless child. I'm desolate. I've never written here before but I'm so alone. Thanks

O your OH needs to get a grip! Midlife crisis! He needs passion after 17 years! Real life is not a romance movie. Does he not realise lust and passion wear off as a relationship matures? If he wants passion then tell him to go and do some some research about how to bring passion back into a long term relationdhip, as you would also like some! Relationships need work and communication to stay healthy. Good luck op as there is nothing worse for your self esteem than a dithering partner.

Thank you scottishlass! I must keep my head up and you've helped x

He is being selfish and you are worth more. Get through this bit of isolation time, restart your business and then decide what you want to do.

Sounds like justification for an affair. Can you go back to your previous career wfh at all?

Thanks guys- I know what you mean in affair but I've really investigated that and I just don't get it... he's many things but not like that. He's not even Pierce Brosnan whatsoever;) so no great threat I think. He's emotionally childish and not used to stuff he can't fix I think. My biz will come back but we're all slowed right now... I'm developing my board work so I know what to do but it's a financial desert right now... it's just not what I was planning!! (Get real right?) my dad left twice and it devastated my family... I'm not letting my kids have that. The very bad mamma bear is out😡

Don't let it all be his decision
Do you love him when he's treating you so poorly?
Is this good enough for you?
Think about what you want

I know I'm at risk of putting myself down by stoically "staying and waiting" (though nowhere to go at mo!) but I refuse to be the villain and tell him to leave. My kids need their home and I won't let him make me do his dirty work. Bit screwed up but ...